Decompression. Entertainment. NBA.

Image

 

I think it’s safe to say that I just finished decompressing from the eyegasm that was Prometheus and Sunday June 10th in general. On Monday June 11th I reflected on the previous day.

10am:
Early morning story confusion but who cares because it was so cool to look at that everything some how made sense (Prometheus).

1pm:
Getting stuck in West Hollywood Gay pride parade and deciding to walk with my girlfriend to a restaurant and have a drink(s).

3pm:
Feeling the affects from the drink(s). When we got home we started to watch the end of Die Hard part 2 until I realized that a unicorn has been sighted and for some inexplicable reason Die Hard part 3 was on another random channel – changed to Sam Jackson and Bruce Willis yelling at Jeremy Irons.

6pm: 
Woke up from the best mid day nap in the history of life and wondered how and why Die Hard part 3 is still on… Maybe the longest movie ever?

7pm:
Watched the season finale of Mad Men and loved every second of it. I haven’t seen a season tie together so well since the previous season of Mad Men. My girlfriend and I discussed and continued discussing on Monday what this season was all about. I don’t think she liked the finale as much as I did but it’s difficult not to appreciate how great that show is.

I don’t want to spoil anything but Don Draper may be the coolest character in the history of television and on par with: Walter White, Cosmo Kramer, Larry David, Homer Simpson, Jack Shepherd, Bill Cosby, Will Smith, Angus MacGyver, Archie Bunker, Tony Soprano, Fonzie Fonzarelli, and Aaron Rodgers from the hit Sunday TV show: NFL Football.

9pmish:
Watched the teaser trailer for Breaking Bad - I’m excited.

10pm: 
Watched Safe House with Denzel and Ryan Reynolds and felt like this may be one of the biggest I didn’t expect that movies I’ve seen in a long time.

By the time Midnight rolled around it was time for me to try and turn off my brain and pass out. At some point Monday I realized that I may be consuming too much information, if that’s even possible. Is it possible? Nah, knowledge is power and I want to know about Don Draper. But as life goes, when one thing ends another thing begins, which brings me to the NBA Finals and the consumption of sports that starts tonight.

This may be the most intriguing match up in years. The Lakers / Celtics from a few years ago was definitely amazing so I can’t disregard it, but what we’re seeing right now has so many implications - I think.

Miami Heat VS Oklahoma City Thumnder. Purchased Super Team VS Drafted rejected from Seattle Team. Durant VS Lebron. Westbrook VS his Craziness VS Wade. James Harden VS … who the F is going to guard James Harden?

What I find most appealing about these finals is that I think Durant is about to go Jordan mode 2.0. I think he’s about to take over and he’s not going anywhere for a long time. I think he’s going to play as well as James, if not outplay him, but more importantly I think OKC is going to win. If OKC does win then that marks a certain problem for many NBA teams. OKC is young and built like the Spurs. If everyone stays healthy and if Durant decides not to leave basketball for baseball then I seriously think they could win 4-5 championships in the next 5-7 years.

When they win, a trickle down effect is going to happen. Teams will start changing their team just to compete with them (like they did with Shaq and Kobe) and we’ll all have to start wondering if LeBron James is the greatest yet most scratch your head what to make of him worthy player in the history of the NBA… if we don’t already think that.

Anyway.

Oklahoma wins in 6. Don’t ask how, don’t ask why. Just know that Durant is going to be the MVP.

Every year when my team I root for gets eliminated I reflect on how much time I just wasted and how much rooting, drinking, projecting, arguing, and eating I just did. I don’t think it’s healthy for about 3 days. Then I remind myself that I love sports and entertainment and if I didn’t have either I’d be lost (or I’d be a genius). I’m already starting to do my reflecting but this NBA finals has allowed me to just look forward.

I can’t wait to decompress a little more. Then football will start and so will breaking bad and the whole cycle repeats itself. Fuck. I love you entertainment.

The Weekend: Quick Recap

 

MOVIE:

It’s official. I broke my “not going to the movie theater” streak this weekend and saw Project X. I had mixed feelings about it and may still be recovering from the hangover I received while watching. Overall I didn’t mind it, I knew what I was getting myself into – A found footage exaggerated drinking comedy in high school. At least, I think it was exaggerated… Coming from the crazy suburban streets of Wisconsin I think it’s safe to say my parties were a tad more contained than that of Project X.

It’s a fun movie and if you’re going to see it don’t expect to see an incarnation of a John Hughes film - It’s more topical to the time we live in. I wonder how many teens got completely hammered after watching the movie and then tried to recreate the premise of the film but only had 8 kids show up at their house… TV:

Lindsay Lohan on SNL: Is it just me or has SNL hit its stride in the last year? Last week’s Maya Rudolph show essentially was one of the best shows I’ve seen as a stand-alone in a long time, and I find myself seeking out skits. Buuuuuut then the stride hit a roadblock named Lindsay Lohan.

Does anyone remember Lohan the actor? Not really, right? She’s just a girl we feel sorry for because of her (seemingly) really bad upbringing and continuous horrible choices. I think that everyone felt like this SNL was an opportunity for her to clean up her image a bit and say, “I’m good, I can still act, and I still have a career!” But the reality is, it didn’t, and she’s not that good anymore… I feel kind of bad for her.

The episode took the easy route of poking fun at Lohan’s past issues, which was funny, but to obvious. Aside from her stumbling over lines she looked uncomfortable. I may be looking to far into this but don’t you think when she was presented with an opportunity to redeem herself on the SNL stage she’d REALLLY go for it like she’s in the final acting role of her life. I think her phoning it in on SNL says a lot about her. Having said that… It was the second highest rated show all season and THIS skit was pretty fucking funny.

Awake: Maybe the coolest show on TV that I hope doesn’t get cancelled. It was created by Kyle Killen aka “The Guy who created The Beaver but then Mel Gibson went Mel Gibson on everyone so the movie bombed” aka “The Guy who created Lone Star but nobody watched it and you don’t know what the hell Lone Star is” aka “This guy is really talented” (Fairly certain I misused “aka’s” and my “quotation marks” “””). Check out Awake.

Celebrity Apprentice: This show is a mess! Shark Tank: This show isn’t a mess and it’s insanely underrated. I think I love Shark Tank. If you don’t know the premise - it’s essentially Mark Cuban and 6 other successful business minds hearing pitches from people and then they bid on it or tell them it’s a horrible idea. The NBA:

I watched The Lakers VS Heat on Sunday and aside from how awesome the game was the other thing people were talking about was D. Wade’s smedium shirt. I think it’s time we have a “best dressed” competition in the NBA.

Chris Paul: The Ex Girlfriend

As a Lakers fan I went through a wave of emotions yesterday. In the morning I was talking to my buddy and we were discussing Dwight Howard and Chris Paul, I was saying how I’d love it if the Lakers got Superfreak Dwight Howard and then we joked for about 3 minutes about how amazing the Lakers would be with both Paul and Howard. About 3 hours later I got this call:

Me: Hello

Him: Did you hear!?

Me: Huh?

Him: Paul for Odom AND Gasol!

(silence)

Me: Dude?

Him: Paul FOR Odom and Gasol!

Me: Don’t fuck with me man, I’m walking down 4th street and can’t take this right now.

Him: Seriously it’s all over the radio!

I ran and checked the Internet but it wasn’t there, apparently 710 ESPN in LA is faster than the Internet. As I scoured various sport outlets to read more I started to think about the trade. I thought about how much I loved Gasol and was even starting to come around to Odom. I started to think of Andrew Bynum’s peanut butter knees and how we’ll have to rely on him, I thought about how this would affect Derrick Fisher, but then I went back to how much I really loved Gasol.

Quick side story on Gasol: I was at a game and as Gasol was walking back to the court after halftime, some crazy fan jumped about 2 feet over the railing right in front of Gasol. As security was running to apprehend the guy, the guy quickly pulled out a marker. Gasol stopped the security guards and slyly grabbed the marker and signed the guy’s jersey. Security ushered him back to his seat. If I wasn’t sold on Gasol, I was then.

You know what else is really weird about Gasol and Odom – my girlfriend knows who they are. Aside from Kobe, I think they’re the only players she actively cares about. In a different time I could picture Gasol as the Dos Equis most interesting man alive, not sure why but he appeals to women… he just does. She knows Odom because he’s a Kardashian – we’ll leave it at that.

Finally the Paul story popped up and it was true, the three-team deal was taking place and I needed to come to terms with two 7 feet players leaving. I had to say goodbye to two key components to rebuilding the Lakers after Shaq departed.

After I was sort of coming to terms with this whole trade and starting to envision Paul tossing an alley-oop to Kobe and Kobe then has to do an acrobatic lay up because his legs are not 23 years old anymore I was officially coming around. I know how great Chris Paul is, that’s not up for question, it’s just the size we’ve lost and the instability of Bynum that’s keeping me worried. And then I get a message….

“The trade was vetoed”

What the fuck? I come to learn Dan “I can’t keep LeBron James so I throw tempter tantrums” Gilbert shot out some email and this is viewed as an unfair trade. The Lakers aren’t getting Chris Paul... And then a moment that happens to every human at some point in their life took place:

The Lakers not getting Chris Paul made me want him even more. I somehow forgot about Gasol’s kindness and Odom’s Kardashian-ness. All I could think about is Chris Paul doing his best Magic Johnson impression to the Lakers last season in the playoffs. I started to envision his healthy knees tossing a half court pass to Kobe and Kobe some how is flying when he catches it, then he dunks on someone.

Chris Paul has become something I want even more because we can’t have him. He’s like the ex girlfriend you didn’t like but she pulled the trigger to break it off with you and suddenly the girlfriend looks about 9 times better. I’m still in this phase. I’m trying to remind myself that when these things don’t happen it’s usually for the better, somehow it always works out.

I have this gut feeling that we’ll get Paul… somehow… someway. In my perfect world we’d get him in free agency next year and the entire Lakers roster reorders their contracts just to sign Paul, just so the Lakers can give the emphatic fuck you to everyone.

Final thoughts:

Even though I know Dan Gilbert isn’t the only man behind this I’ve never been Team LeBron more than I am right now.

It’s too bad we couldn’t get Dwight Howard - that may solve everything.

My friend just text me and said I had a man crush on Chris Paul.

It may not be wise to mock LeBron any more. Last night the Heat played the Magic and Dwight Howar

It may not be wise to mock LeBron any more. Last night the Heat played the Magic and Dwight Howard and co. decided to do a little Bron mock.

Little did they know he probably took offense because he decided to drop 51 pts, 11 rebounds, and 8 assists. I actually think LeBron is boring now simply because he’s playing next to D Wade who may actually be better than him, but still… come on, he’s Bron.

Has he really lost all respect, is he a joke?

Earlier this year Paul Pierce took a jab at him. Is the respect gone?

LeBron James meet Darth Vader

Uh Oh. He’s embraced it. He’s embraced being the bad guy.

LeBron has just embraced Darth Vader. It’s finally happened. My friend mentioned an article that I would definitely reference if I could remember where it was from. But the article made the point that LeBron has always been the superhero and never the villain. As soon as he murmured the words I’m taking my talents to south beach the hero died and the first part of this NBA season LeBron wasn’t used to being the villain, he’s always the hero.

Something happened recently, the hero went back to the town that he once protected… wait, enough with the comic talk, I’ll try to stop that now. He went back to the city he spurned, he was supposed to be the savior and then in their eyes he went Judas on them. Cleveland. Poor Cleveland, it feels as though they are just destined for absolute failure. LeBron went to his hometown to more boos than he’s ever heard in his collective 7 year NBA career and although that may sound foreign it’s not. He’s booed every time he plays in somewhere that’s not Miami.

But! This hero complex disappeared in one game. It wasn’t until Cleveland that he embraced this villain and went dark side on us. LeBron scored at will and he sat out the entire 4th quarter and the Heat still won by 50…okay 30(ish).

It was at that moment everything changed and he knew it. He knew that the only way to silence everyone is to kick their asses so badly that they have no choice but to shut up. If they didn’t shut up he’d keep on embarrassing them, and that’s what he’s doing now.

LeBron is back and he’s better than ever. He’s LeBron 2.0 aka LeBronakin Jameswalker. The one time jedi may have just figured out the powers of the dark side. He displayed that last night when he dropped a triple double on New York – the one time hopeful recipient of one LBJ.

So here we are the man has just killed Padme and he’s officially Vader. Who knows how long the dark side reign will last, who knows who the Sith Lord is, and who knows which one D Wade and Chris Bosh are… I don’t want to speculate on how this all ends because I’m having too much fun watch the Dark Side. But we all know how it ends.