YouTube Admission.

There is definitely something ironic about the fact that I’m typing about YouTube. I feel that this should realistically be a video right now, but it would be totally boring, I think. The funny thing is, I think I know what works on YouTube and then other times I’m completely dumbfounded. I need to use this as a platform to mentally sort things out. I wonder if others are in my same boat and I     wonder if others have things figured out.

So where do I begin? Shit, I don’t even know. I have this app on my ipad that I never use which basically is a mental map and lets you sort out your thoughts. I wish that were how this posting actually would look. My best bet is to try and categorize this and then hope it just all makes sense.

The Clutter:

YouTube is walking a very odd line. On one hand it holds the key to careers and is a platform for major national issues. On the other hand it’s the hub for mindless guy-picks-fight-with-stranger-and-then-stranger-kicks-his-ass videos. Then there are sports highlights, musical acts, travel shows, promotional videos for company websites, and about 75 other categories. The truth is, I’ve been trying to figure out where exactly I can personally fall into YouTube clutter. But also, I think that YouTube is currently trying to figure itself out in the clutter.

I wonder if they want all of the clutter or if they want to trim down all of the under produced content. I mean, lets face it, it’s weird (yet cool) that a company can have such amazing high production quality content and then also host a dog taking a shit on a sleeping person (not sure if this video actually exists but I’m sure it does).

Trimming out the shit:

The cool thing about YouTube, and really the web, is the ability to post content anywhere so you can penetrate a surface that you couldn’t previously touch. It’s obvious that a TON of great opportunities and talented people have come from creating great things. That aspect of the web/YouTube is unbelievably amazing.

As it stands now YouTube has made things more difficult if you’re not established. Even the terms of being “established” have changed. Recently YouTube hosted its “NextUp” competition. Essentially it’s a program that allows people like you and I to submit videos, then people vote on the videos, and if you’re one of 25 winners you get help and assistance from YouTube to really establish your personal brand Sounds good, right?

Weird thing is, in the latest NextUp competition the submission guidelines were written as:

Have at least 10,000 subscribers on December 5, 2012 and/or at least 1,500,000 total videos views all-time for your Channel on December 5, 2012;

Wait. First off, it is fucking tough to get 10,000 subscribers and it is really fucking tough to get 1.5million views. So shit. 10,000 is borderline established to me. If you crack a certain amount of subscribers then what that tells me is – people like your content, they’re willing to share it, and you have a solid and possibly loyal fan base. The only way you can mess this up is by not posting videos for years or by immediately changing your style.

This brings me back to trimming the shit. It seems as though YouTube only wants sort-of-established content creators who can already build their audience. They want people who are big and they can make bigger. Not to profile small and unnoticed.

Can small folk succeed?

Yes. How? I’m not totally sure. What I do know is that if you’re legitimately trying to grow and not be a one hit wonder then you need consistency and quality. This isn’t new to anyone.

It is too late but not really:

If you don’t have a channel on YouTube, and you’re just getting going, and you want to create a big channel, it’s tough. You need to jump onto the social scene guns ablaze. If you’re trying to create a show then you need to release consistently. If you’re just going to drop periodic episodes of whatever you’re doing… eh… you may not get to where you want to be.

Where I think YouTube is going:

Like I mentioned above, it is trimming out the shit. YouTube recently said it’s going to alter channel design (again). Yesterday I had a moment to check it out via a iJustine video where she profiled the new layout. The take away that I got is that it is tailored for creators to brand themselves. This is cool. It forces people to really treat themselves as marketers. It’s unfortunate for people who just release good stuff but don’t know how to market themselves. Hopefully, content will succeed.

Final thoughts of this:

Where did this ramble lead too? I’m not sure. Where did this come from? It comes from a place of a person who makes content and occasionally feels a step behind in evolving with the system. I know this may not be how it seems but I’m not bitter or upset with the current system, I actually kind of love it. The YouTube landscape is an interesting thing. It can consume you. It’s amazing knowing there is something in the world that gives you so many varieties, and also this same something can be beneficial for your success.

YouTube is amazing. The web is amazing. I’d consider right now as sort of turning point, particularly for YouTube. It’s a moment when they make a push into quality programming and then possibly morph into Netflix with a pay-per-view style. Then what happens? We start over again and a new YouTube takes over, but one that is more tailored for up and coming creators? Doubtful…but possible.

One thing I do know – There will always be a need for total nonsense viewing. We will always have videos of humans doing stupid shit with bad audio, bad lighting, and a shaky camera. The voyeuristic aspect of watching content won’t go away. Dammit YouTube, I love you.

 

Howdy Doody Is Creepy.

I purchased some Howdy Doody DVDs as a joke for my 1 year old nephew. Don't ask why, it's a long story. I tried to watch the show and about 2 minutes in I realized how creepy this puppet is. I can imagine a new potential Childs Play series based off of Howdy Doody. Am I the only one who finds this smiling cowboy a little odd?

Ashton Kutcher!

 

So, Forbes named Ashton Kutcher TV’s highest paid actor by bringing in 24 million between May 2011 and May 2012. I almost can’t believe I’m going to say this but is this guy a genius? I’d be lying if I didn’t say I appreciate (maybe admire) what he’s doing and basically what he has been doing for the last 10 years or so.

Aside from being the dumb guy on That 70’s Show his biggest contributions have been in the tech world and investing in start up companies. He seems to have some foresight and takes chances with new technology. I remember reading an article about 6 years ago that I was positive was in Time (I just searched the web and can’t find it) that was written by Kutcher discussing the benefits of twitter. In the last few years he’s seemingly invested in 20+ start ups and is on advisory boards of a handful of companies.

Whatever it may be worth you have to at least appreciate what he’s doing. When I first moved to LA he had a restaurant located about 10 minutes away from me on Sweetzer and Melrose called Dolce and now, many years later, that restaurant is closed down and looks as though Ratatouille may be cooking for all of his rat friends because the place is run down and taken over. He went through the “I’m a celebrity I need a restaurant phase.” Now, it seems as though tech investment is the smart thing for him.

I get the sense that he’s on TV to pay for his tech investments, and if that’s the case, then this guy is even smarter than I thought… and I can definitely appreciate that.

It’s early, I need coffee, and this has just filled my Ashton Kutcher quota for the next year or so.

*Side note: The Butterfly Effect is slightly underrated.

Dustin Diamond and the Greatest Party Ever?

I jumped on facebook this morning and my buddy Marko had mentioned this party. I almost can’t believe it’s real. I kind of love that Dustin Diamond lives in Wisconsin and I kind of love he’s driving this Screech thing into the ground. I wish he’d embrace it a bit more.

I did a little more digging then found this YouTube video that he released to promote his party a little more (below). If anyone goes to this party you need to let me know. I cannot stress this enough… You need to tell me everything!

Thanks again Marko.

ps: DJ James Freshluggage - Greatest name ever?

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZe5_VSq00w&w=420&h=315]

'Glee' and the (Non)Progression

 

I like Ryan Murphy. I would even say that admire what Ryan Murphy has been able to do on television. I feel that he’s managed to constantly create highly engaging programs but also do it in a new and artistic way. Due to this artistic/stylized vision I used to watch Glee pretty regularly but had to stop after they just kept going to nationals and it turned into too much of a soap opera.

I’d occasionally jump back into Glee to see what’s happening and also because I like the musical numbers (seriously) so I managed to catch a bit last season. I wasn’t too sure what was happening with all of the characters but what I did know is that Quinn (Diana Agron) was in a car accident and Rachel (Lea Michele) was moving to New York. Aside from that, I didn’t know what the hell was happening.

Seeing that we’re in fall TV mode I did kind of wonder what happened to everyone and I even kind of made a point to watch the show to check out how it’s progressed. As I drove down La Cienega (Los Angeles shout out!) I saw a billboard with Kate Hudson dropping the patented Glee “L” (representing “Loser”) over Rachel, whom is obviously in NY – then I remembered. I remembered why I don’t watch the show and I had to ask myself: Is the show really progressing?

Ignoring the big question of “why is Kate Hudson on Glee” lets jump to the smaller question of “why does Glee think everyone is a Loser?” I get it Glee – Being in High School and singing isn’t exactly what the “popular” kids do so we’ll go ahead and toss random slushies on them to represent them being losers but you’re going to try and pull this shit in NY? Really?

I suppose Glee finds itself in a weird position. It’s one of those shows that shouldn’t last longer than three seasons but it’s trying to extend its glory days and use the themes that we all know and love, that theme being the “L” thing aka “The Underdog theme.”

The unfortunate reality is it’s not progressing and pushing forward like it once was; now it’s just that show where random celebrities pop in and sing songs from their childhood. The days of having the songs mean something to move the story forward is gone.

Why am I thinking about Glee this much? I have no Fing clue. As I’ve written this out I realized that I really liked the show more than I thought. I also realized that Glee is about to face the inevitable scenario of kids not being in high school anymore. As far as I know, no show except maybe One Tree Hill has successfully embraced this change… maybe Gossip Girl?

Wow… I can’t wait for Breaking Bad, Mad Men, or any show that reminds me I’m not a 15 year old female to be back on - is this what I’m going to be writing about for the next few months?

Breaking Bad: The Prison Scene

There’s no doubt that I’m not going to be the first person to say how amazing Sunday’s episode of Breaking Bad was. I actually told myself I wasn’t going to write anything about it because it’s one of those “no shit, it was cool, what do you have to say about it" moments. But I had to write something and I wanted to take a moment and appreciate the coolest two minutes that television (probably) has ever handed me: The Prison Scene.

Thing is, I don’t know if this scene even needs a set up. If you watch the show the set up was slowly burning for seven previous episodes. If you don’t watch the show you can just marvel at the awesomeness of what’s happening. I cannot stress enough how amazing this show is and I wish everyone would watch it so I could talk to you and discuss anything and everything.

I give you, The Prison Scene. The Scene where Walter White teams up with skinhead assholes to take out ten guys in two minutes, all in dramatic fashion:

Hope this videos isn’t taken down…

UPDATE: 9-6 The video was taken down, which isn’t surprising. The prison scene video had a good life here on the site. Just go watch Breaking Bad!

Breaking Bad Coins A Term.

 

 

Time has passed and I can finally make sense of what happened on Breaking Bad this past Sunday. I’m not going to go into show reflection mode because we live in social media world and talking about something that happened on Sunday is basically like reflecting on the early 2000’s. What I’m going to talk about is the term that Breaking Bad may have inadvertently created, and when I say inadvertently I mean that I’m actually making a term up right now… but only because of Breaking Bad.

SPOILERS AHEAD!

So, the crazy twenty-minute train robbery that only Breaking Bad could have pulled off wasn’t the craziest thing that took place, anyone who was watching had the jaw drop moment right after Walt, Jessie, and homie from Friday Night Lights stole the meth. The kid from Friday Night Lights proceeded to shoot the lone witness to the train robbery… A kid.

Yes, a kid.

Breaking Bad took the next step on Sunday. They crossed the threshold and there is really no turning back at this point. To be honest, I didn’t even think it was possible, but it happened. In the world of bad guys I think there is one “thing” you can do to really validate how fucked up you are and how fucked up the repercussions will be. Breaking Bad went there, they shot a child.

For the record, this wasn’t a kid doing anything wrong; it was just an unassuming kid out on an unassuming dirt bike ride. The craziest part about this is that the child was shot not by, but because of, our main character – Walter White. Wasn’t Walter our “hero” at some point? How the shit did they just turn this around so much? How and why are we rooting for Walter still?

Back to the new term!

Happy Days brought us “Jump The Shark” (When a show has gone to far)

Indiana Jones 4 brought us “Nuke The Fridge” (When a movie has just gone to far)

And now:

Breaking Bad has bought us “Shoot The Kid” (When a show decided to cross the “holy shit what the fuck else could happen” line.

For the record, at least Breaking Bad has created a term that doesn’t mean you completely screwed up, but rather, that the characters are completely screwed.

Remember at the end of the movie Seven when Kevin Spacey was talking to Brad Pitt in his creepy voice saying “What I’m doing will be studied for years.” That’s how I feel about Breaking Bad. This show and the turns will be studied for years with people debating how and why certain things happened – and I’m okay with that.

If Breaking Bad somehow coins another term that is as heavy as “shoot the kid” my head may explode – and I’m also okay with that.

Weekend Recap and Looking Forward...

 

It’s never good to look back on what was but I’d argue that, that rule doesn’t hold completely firm when dealing with entertainment and sports. When dealing with entertainment it’s always good to look back, quote movies, re-watch things, and then talk about how we could have done something different if a film or show isn’t what we expected. Same rule applies for sports; living in the past is what gives us hope for the future.

On the same hand, it’s good to look ahead and what’s to come, and I’m essentially going to try and do both right now. I should note that I’m not going to look to far back, just the previous weekend. The weekends are amazing, for me it’s a time where anything is game… and I kind of think that’s how they should always be. Regarding looking ahead, we’re peeking into the full week.

Friday:

The Olympics. I managed to watch roughly three hours of the opening games and I was a bit underwhelmed. I think I’m spoiled from the Beijing opening. Truthfully I didn’t know what the hell was going on, but it was a grand scale, so there needs to be some credit handed out.

I started to question the Olympics and the various competitions. I wish there was a bigger reward for the winners because quite honestly I don’t think that everyone appreciates a gold medal. I wish the stakes were higher.

I think the opening ceremony put me to sleep because I don’t know what else happened to me.

Saturday:

I rode my bike for the majority of the day and was more tired than I can explain. I proceeded to plant myself on the couch and watch two things that I wish I could burn from my mind:

Faster with The Rock and Billy Bob Thornton. I came into this movie about five minutes late and I left after about thirty minutes. Has anyone seen this movie? What’s the premise? I love The Rock but what was happening in this movie.

Sex and the City 2. I would honestly rather watch these women in NY having the same arguments and doing the same things than ever watch them go to India. I wonder how this idea was given a green light.

Post Sex and the City 2 I loaded up on a few glasses of wine and caught up on Fringe. Fringe, is a show that is highly underrated but I can understand why it doesn’t have a larger audience. I wish I wasn’t so late to the party watching it because I would have been a larger Fringe advocate throughout the past years. If anyone wants a good Sci Fi show, watch Fringe.

Sunday:

Turned on the Olympics and female cycling was on. Turned off Olympics and ran some errands with my girlfriend. Three to four hours later I turned on the Olympics and the same exact race was happening but it was coming to an end. Somehow female cycling was captivating but I don’t know who could have watched the whole race. If you’re out there, show yourself.

It’s somewhat difficult for me to write this without some hesitancy, but I need to embrace it and just go with it. I managed to cram my Sunday night with an episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians and thenBreaking Bad. I’m not sure when it started to happen but whenever I’d turn on the TV the Kardashians were there, and I occasionally started to watch. But now, I just watch them before I watch Walter White go meth crazy on everyone.

Crazy Kardashian happenings- Kim Kardashian apparently has a sixth sense for detecting cavities. Let me repeat that, wait, no I won’t. Just know that I wrote about Kim’s sixth sense and also know that I can’t believe I wrote that.

Crazy Breaking Bad happenings- Everything. It’s the best show on TV.

Random weekend facts – The Watch with Stiller, Hill, and Vaughn didn’t exactly do well at the box office this week proving that you cannot just throw funny people on a billboard and expect money. I caught the new Seinfeld webseries on Crackle.com and it was hilarious. I suggest everyone should check it out.

Looking ahead here’s what you can expect:

More Olympics. More Kardashians. More Breaking Bad. The return of Colin Farrell in Total Recall.

… That pretty much sums it up.

21 Jump Street - Check it Out!

My God there is a lot on the Internet. I’m actually worried that there may be too much. Every single web page is a portal into 55 different options and I don’t know how I feel about it. On one hand I’m insanely happy for the options and on the other hand I just don’t want so many options – it’s in our nature to explore everything.

When I wrote the first sentence above I was confident that I was going to be able to transition into movies rather easily. The plan was to talk about how great it felt to be back inside a movie theater, and not feeling so overwhelmed with so many different choices. It feels good to shut off and be in a position where you’re entertained. But my transition started to take a left turn when I realized I was about to go on a rant on the Internet and feeling like my head will explode with options.

Fuck. I know there is a segway into how good it feels to be around great movies – oh, that was just it – MY TRANSITION! Forget the internet talk for now… on to movies.

You know when you’re somewhere and you feel like that’s exactly where you’re supposed to be? That’s how I feel when I’m watching a good movie. You’re not worried about anything else or thinking about work, email, twitter, friends, and what else is going on – You’re in the right spot. I think deep down that’s part of the allure of a good movie. You’re in the right place at the right time and it’s an escape. Watching something good makes you think, “That’s what I want to do” or “That’s what I want to be.” Am I looking to deep into movies and entertainment? Maybe.

I was fortunate enough to see 21 Jump Street on Tuesday and I loved it. Without breaking down the specifics like acting or directing, I found myself laughing – a lot. For an hour in a half I felt lost in a really funny movie. Lets be honest: 21 Jump Street isn’t exactly going for an Academy Award, it’s created for the sole purpose to make us laugh and to be entertained. It did just that.

I think there are 5 different types of people when it comes to this movie:

The people who watched the TV show and are pissed they made a movie with Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum so won’t see it.

The people who watched the TV show and are happy they made a movie so will see it.

The people who love Hill and Tatum and definitely will see it.

The people who don’t love Hill or Tatum and won’t see it.

The fence people… could live with it, could live without it.

In the various personalities above there are sub categories, but you fall somewhere in there (trust me). Wherever you fall I’m confident you have to find some humor in this film. Just know that going into it it’s a comedy with JONAH HILL, so don’t be surprised when you see jokes that are so far out there you have to question what just happened.

Now breaking down some specifics:

Channing and Jonah – Truth be told I wasn’t to sold on Tatum and his comedy chops but he kills it. He does a great job and I think he’s the stand out.

The Film itself – The film is out there… in a good way. I definitely think it has it’s own feeling and vibe. Its kind of a hybrid of Superbad meets a Ruben Fleischer sensibility type film. If you don’t know Fleischer, he did Zombieland and 30 Minutes or Less. The film has an interesting feel to it - lets just say that. It absolutely has it’s own stamp and is very relevant to the time we’re in.

Supporting Cast – Solid, very funny.

Really Awesome Cameo that you should find out on your own – is there. As an overall I think this general concept is really cool and honestly I wish I were into the TV show when it was relevant (it was a little before my time). I’m sure there is some purists who don’t want to see an old show get retooled like this and I get it, but at the same time you have to get over it. To be fair it’s just the general concept of the TV show, it’s not as though this is the first film where adults posed as high school students.

When you find yourself planning to get hammered for St. Patty’s day this weekend do yourself a favor and sneak this movie in, or sneak this movie in while you’re getting hammered. Either way, enjoy a fun movie escape and laugh for a little bit. I’m interested as to what people are going to think about it and what it’ll do for Tatum’s comedy career.

If you’re into rotten tomatoes and general reviews it’s currently tracking with 85% positive… That’s a good thing…

Just because, check out this teaser:

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AhDCAww9Dwg&w=560&h=315]

You should be watching AWAKE

 

I briefly mentioned the TV show AWAKE last week but I need to press it again because I really wish I didn’t have a gut feeling that my new favorite show, that isn’t a comedy, was going to be cancelled. I’ve also found myself personally rooting for the creator of the show simply because he’s had a string of bad luck… kind of rooting for the underdog right now. Quick little run down of creator Kyle Killen:

Killen wrote the screenplay for the film The Beaver, which was a pretty sought after script on The Black List. Unfortunately the film was fucked due to Mel Gibson and his angriness. Post Beaver he created a show called Lone Star which nobody was watching, and on the verge of cancellation Killen wrote a open letter essentially asking people to watch – which is kind of cool if you ask me, did anyone ask me? No. But still, it’s very cool. And now we have Awake. Check the plot outline:

After a car accident takes the life of a family member, a police detective lives two alternating parallel lives, one with his wife and one with his son. Is one of his “realities” merely a dream?

Parallel universe – CHECK.

Cop shit – CHECK.

Interesting story – CHECK.

Potential to an interesting story – CHECK.

The lead character is the badass from The Patriot and also the guy who killed Snape in Harry Potter aka Jason Isaacs – CHECK. That insanely detailed checklist is essentially what makes the show really good but also is probably the exact reason why it’s going to be cancelled. It’s currently blending genres with hints of sci fi and crime procedural. This is great for people like me who are remembering to DVR NBC at 10pm, but I fear I’m the minority. Also, the show doesn’t feel like a show people would seek out and watch via Hulu, Netflix, or apple TV. It feels like one of those shows geared for older single guys or younger guys with a girlfriend.

Does that even make sense?

I think the show has a great premise, great story, good characters, but will be viewed as a little to slow, which could also be the exact problem with previously cancelled Lone Star. I think that new hour-long shows are difficult to sustain if you don’t have a previous built in audience, our attention spans are crumbling by the minute, I’m even fearful right now that I’ve written to much… this is to long for average reader! I’m wrapping it up – Watch Awake. Give it a shot. It’s on Thursday night on NBC 10/9c.

Do it!

The Weekend: Quick Recap

 

MOVIE:

It’s official. I broke my “not going to the movie theater” streak this weekend and saw Project X. I had mixed feelings about it and may still be recovering from the hangover I received while watching. Overall I didn’t mind it, I knew what I was getting myself into – A found footage exaggerated drinking comedy in high school. At least, I think it was exaggerated… Coming from the crazy suburban streets of Wisconsin I think it’s safe to say my parties were a tad more contained than that of Project X.

It’s a fun movie and if you’re going to see it don’t expect to see an incarnation of a John Hughes film - It’s more topical to the time we live in. I wonder how many teens got completely hammered after watching the movie and then tried to recreate the premise of the film but only had 8 kids show up at their house… TV:

Lindsay Lohan on SNL: Is it just me or has SNL hit its stride in the last year? Last week’s Maya Rudolph show essentially was one of the best shows I’ve seen as a stand-alone in a long time, and I find myself seeking out skits. Buuuuuut then the stride hit a roadblock named Lindsay Lohan.

Does anyone remember Lohan the actor? Not really, right? She’s just a girl we feel sorry for because of her (seemingly) really bad upbringing and continuous horrible choices. I think that everyone felt like this SNL was an opportunity for her to clean up her image a bit and say, “I’m good, I can still act, and I still have a career!” But the reality is, it didn’t, and she’s not that good anymore… I feel kind of bad for her.

The episode took the easy route of poking fun at Lohan’s past issues, which was funny, but to obvious. Aside from her stumbling over lines she looked uncomfortable. I may be looking to far into this but don’t you think when she was presented with an opportunity to redeem herself on the SNL stage she’d REALLLY go for it like she’s in the final acting role of her life. I think her phoning it in on SNL says a lot about her. Having said that… It was the second highest rated show all season and THIS skit was pretty fucking funny.

Awake: Maybe the coolest show on TV that I hope doesn’t get cancelled. It was created by Kyle Killen aka “The Guy who created The Beaver but then Mel Gibson went Mel Gibson on everyone so the movie bombed” aka “The Guy who created Lone Star but nobody watched it and you don’t know what the hell Lone Star is” aka “This guy is really talented” (Fairly certain I misused “aka’s” and my “quotation marks” “””). Check out Awake.

Celebrity Apprentice: This show is a mess! Shark Tank: This show isn’t a mess and it’s insanely underrated. I think I love Shark Tank. If you don’t know the premise - it’s essentially Mark Cuban and 6 other successful business minds hearing pitches from people and then they bid on it or tell them it’s a horrible idea. The NBA:

I watched The Lakers VS Heat on Sunday and aside from how awesome the game was the other thing people were talking about was D. Wade’s smedium shirt. I think it’s time we have a “best dressed” competition in the NBA.

SNL: The Recap

Did anyone happen to catch Saturday Night Live this past Saturday? If you didn’t then you missed maybe one of the consistently funny episodes in a long time. I feel that there is this general understanding that SNL is funny for about 65 percent of it’s episode and the lackluster skits get pushed towards the backend – this past Saturday wasn’t the case.

Maya Rudolph was the host and apparently that meant to bring on everyone and anyone. Random surprise guests were: Justin Timberlake, Amy Poehler, Bill O’ Reilly, and Kate Upton (The Sports Illustrated Model).

Random side note: I honestly had watched “In Time” earlier in the night and wrote off Timberlake, then watched this episode and felt some minor redemption.

I first wrote this post with the intention of embedding each clip in this blog but for whatever reason HULU is stubborn and won’t let me. To try and make up for it I’ve included the link…

We have to start with the cold opening, this basically set the tone for me. Typically this is a political themed skit but this time it was a racially charged take on the Jeremy Lin scenario in NY:

LINK THAT I WISH WAS THE EMBEDDED VIDEO!

Jay-Z and Beyonce’s Baby: My God this was funny. Jay Pharoah is great, and I hope he continues to be more prominent on the show:

LINK THAT I WISH WAS THE EMBEDDED VIDEO!

Cosby Obama: This was a skit that was pushed towards the latter half of the show and I couldn’t believe it. I think this would have killed in the first 30 minutes. Basic premise…errr… The Obama’s as the Cosby Show.

LINK THAT I WISH WAS THE EMBEDDED VIDEO!

What’s Up With That - Presidents Day Edition: Remember Keenan from Keenan and Kel on Nickelodeon? I’m happy he’s still working in the comedy world, and this character is his stand out on the show. My initial reaction when seeing this –“What the hell is Bill O’ Reilly doing on SNL!?” and I loved every minute of it. Jason Sudeikis in his red jumpsuit is the stand out in these:

LINK THAT I WISH WAS THE EMBEDDED VIDEO!

Bronx Beat: Poehler was back and a special surprise from Timberlake. I typically don’t like women ranting back and forth by Rudolph and Poehler were great:

LINK THAT I WISH WAS THE EMBEDDED VIDEO!

Maya Angelou Prank Show: This was amazing:

LINK THAT I WISH WAS THE EMBEDDED VIDEO!

The Weekend Update: Poehler was back with Seth Meyers, and once again very funny. I kind of miss Poehler on SNL:

LINK THAT I WISH WAS THE EMBEDDED VIDEO!

There are still a few skits out there that almost made the cut, but I couldn’t put the entire episode on here… although I almost did. I think it’s great that various cast members are really starting to hit their stride and it’s amazing how SNL can continue to evolve. Rudolph brought it, this was a great episode, and sometimes I forget how funny SNL is.

Thoughts and Advice: The Quarterback

It’s official. A couple days after the most watched Super Bowl / TV program of all time the NFL season has concluded. Truthfully, my season took a major hit somewhere around 5pm PST on January 15th 2012. It was then that I watched super Eli torch the Packers the same way he did a few years ago, and I was once again reminded that it’s foolish to be so invested into something you have no control over. Am I masking my pain right now – Yes, probably.

Us Green Bay Packers fans were spoiled last year and by the out-of-nowhere Packers. We were spoiled with Aaron Rodgers nailing the Favre memory coffin and we were spoiled with a near perfect season…. Damn you for being so good then so bad! Who cares, it’s over time to move on and think of the 2012-2013, but truthfully part of me doesn’t want to think about it, I need a break. I can’t take losing any more bets and thinking about what could be… I’m taking a NFL sabbatical.

Before I stop talking about the NFL and put my efforts into more important things like movies, writing, reality TV, the Internet, and contemplating watching Justin Bieber’s movie on Netflix. I would like to give my advice on the most coveted position in the NFL: The Quarterback.

If you haven’t figured it out by now, where your QB goes, the team will follow. The new NFL coddling rules for a QB has made the position more important than ever. Having said that and moving forward I give you the:

Random Thoughts and Advice for the 2012-2013 starting QB’s of the NFL.

Arizona Cardinals - Kevin Kolb: Dude, I hope you stay away from the injuries and moving forward you need to stop thinking about all the hype you had going into the Cardinals season. Smile in your picture next year, you look miserable.

Atlanta Falcons - Matt Ryan: Change your name to Jack and channel your inner Tom Clancy.

Baltimore Ravens – Joe Flacco: I’ve always though Flacco could be named Flacman and have a legit chance of being a superhero somewhere. Just stay away from Ray Lewis.

Buffalo Bills – Ryan Fitzpatrick: We get it. You went to Harvard and have a massive beard, but the mystique has worn off. Shave that beard already.

Carolina Panther – Cam Newton: Probably one of the best rookies I didn’t watch. Newton is going to be a monster if he can stay healthy and everyone knows it.

Chicago Bears – Jay Cutler: Cutler watch out for Josh McNown… Yeah I’m just kidding. Cutler should start a new reality show with Kristen Cavalari and follow in the footsteps of Khloe and Lamar. HBO presents: (Insert anything here regarding Hard Knocks and Jay Cutler reality)

Cincinnati Bengals – Andy Dalton: Andy Dalton either sounds like a serial killer or everyone’s best friend… which is the trait of a serial killer!

Cleveland Browns – Colt McCoy: In the history of life has there ever been a more Texan name than Colt McCoy? Wait… he was born in New Mexico? But he went to Texas for college? Did he change his name midway through life just to fit in? Mind. Can’t. Compute. It was just meant to be. Last thing I remember is McCoy behind leveled in a game and playing through a concussion. Stay healthy.

Dallas Cowboys – Tony Romo:  I love Tony Romo for a few reasons: 1) He’s from Wisconsin. 2) He still sports starter gear like it’s 1995. 3) He kind of reminds me of Favre. Moving forward Romo needs to find any possible wide receiver that’s out there… Even T.O!

Denver Broncos – Tim Tebow: Will Tebow even be the starter next season? If so, for how long? I love this guy; he made the NFL amazing this year. My advice for Tebow is to ultimately ask himself for advice because he seems to have it all figured out.

Detroit Lions – Matt Stafford: The Staff-infection. Congrats on staying healthy this year, I hope (and dare you) to do it again.

Green Bay Packers – Aaron Rodgers: Bring back the Title Belt victory “dance”! You had the best consistent celebration going until Timothy Tebow started Tebowing… Embrace your celebration! Don’t hide behind the discount double check commercials.

Houston Texans – Matt Schaub errr Matt Lienart errr T.J. Yates: Um seriously who is the starting QB? Can’t Arian Foster just play this position and get it over with?

Indianapolis Colts – Peyton Manning: Not sure what’s going to happen here. Is it going to be Andrew Luck? Peyton, my advice to you is go ask Eli what to do, he seems to know it all. But seriously, I think Peyton should join the Jets and allow the Mannings to own NY.

Jacksonville Jaguars – Blaine Gabbert: I love Gabbert basically because of his last name. I’ve seen Gabbert playing for a total of 3 minutes this year… and that’s via ESPN highlights.

Miami Dolphins – Chad Henne: Hmmm, don’t know much about Henne, just make room for Matt Flynn.

Minnesota Vikings – Christian Ponder: Remember Donovan McNabb? Remember Brett Favre before McNabb!? Ponder has never looked better.

New England Patriots – Tom Brady: Is Tom Brady going to go down in history as the guy who has a “but he…” on his resume? IE: Tom Brady was maybe the greatest quarterback ever but he always lost to Eli. Or, Tom Brady lost to Eli but he is married to Giselle so whatever.

New Orleans Saints – Drew Brees: Why do I feel like Brees plays for nothing? It seems like he should have come away with so much more this past season.

New York Giants – Eli Manning: In Eli I trust. He’s got a monster head - seriously he still looks like a little kid in that oversized helmet and if he’s anywhere close to the playoffs next year…. Watch out.

New York Jets – Mark Sanchez: I get the feeling that Sanchez is living the life right now but it’s starting to catch up to him. If he doesn’t perform next year I think he’s done. Advice to him: Don’t lose in NY.

Oakland Raiders – Carson Palmer: What are they going to do with the quarterback fiasco in Oakland, and how poorly did this past season play out for The Raiders? Palmer needs to get off the surfboard and start playing; I think next season is his last shot (kind of like Sanchez)

Philadelphia Eagles – Mike Vick: I get the feeling Vick is going to be amazing next year (don’t say a dog joke, don’t say a dog joke) if I were him I would lobby for a wide receiver. Vick is good but he needs someone who’s his prime target.

Pittsburgh Steelers – Ben Roethlisberger: Did Ben really think he was going to beat Tebow in the playoffs? Fortunately Tebow just wiped Ben’s sins away, meaning next year it looks like the Steelers will be back in the Super Bowl with Mike “don’t blink” Tomlin.

San Diego Chargers – Phillip Rivers: Rivers reminds me of a crazy Chucky doll for some reason. This guy needs to just keep yelling at people and I think he’ll be fine.

San Francisco 49ers – Alex Smith: Was this past season a fluke? Will Harbaugh consider taking over for Smith as the QB? I don’t watch many 49ers games but you know what this guy needs to do – run more, he’s deceitfully fast.

Seattle Seahawks – Tavaris Jackson: It took me a minute to remember that Hasselbeck isn’t their QB anymore. Jackson just needs to keep playing into the Pete Carrol’s system and he’ll be fine. I actually find this guy to be underrated.

St. Louis Rams – Sam Bradford: Advice to you… hand the ball off as many times as possible.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Josh Freeman: Full discretion – I know nothing about the Bucs.

Tennessee Titans - Matt Hasselbeck:  Matt, you have a few years left… I still love you because you were an amazing back up on the Packers, and I’ll never forget your coin flip fuck up in the playoffs. Advice moving forward: Get out of Tennessee.

Washington Redskins – Rex Grossman: Why do I feel like this is one of the most dysfunctional teams in the NFL? Grossman needs to hand it off.

Words of wisdom from someone who is so irrelevant to a NFL player that it’s not even worth thinking about how far I’d fall on the totem pole. It’s my final assessment and my best chance to close the door on this NFL season only to wait for a key to arrive for next season. I’m genuinely happy for the Giants… it was a great season. Must. Focus. Elsewhere.

 

 

 

Poster Breakdown: The Voice

Quick little fact – I really liked The Voice I’m not totally sure why because I actually think it’s cheesy at times. It’s basically the positive version of any other musical competition show. When I heard the new season was starting after the super bowl I had to remind myself that I liked the show, but somewhere through the X-Factor, American Idol, and commercials for Smash I forgot about The Voice. Today I was driving and saw the billboard and my initial reaction: What the hell? I think it’s time to break down the new poster for The Voice –

 

Lets just start with the obvious: What’s up with Christina Aguilera’s arm? 1st - it’s coming out of her back. 2nd – That’s a man hand. 3rd – THAT’S A MAN HAND. 4th – I can still see the poor photo shopping around her massive fingers. 5th – Why is her ring so awkward on her finger? 6th – Is that different nail polish coloring on her thumb than her other fingers? Yes.

The Guys: Where are you staring and pointing Adam Levine? Same question for you, Blake Shelton? And Cee-Lo Green, what are you reaching for with just one hand like that?

Cee-Lo: Why are you always wearing sun glasses?

The Peace Sign: Okay, it’s sort of clever… right? We get the peace sign is also a V, but do you really think it’s going to catch on? This isn’t The Hunger Games and you aren’t Katniss Everdeen showing solidarity to The Twelfth District.

The Background: Not a fan, what’s the deal?

Back to Cee-Lo: What are you wearing? Is that one step away from a Dashiki? I kind of think it is

Back to Levine: Seriously, that point and look are not even going the same direction.

When is Brittney Spears going to host a reality show (trying to forget that show she did with K-Fed).

 

The Voice!

 

The Celebrity Adjustment

 

I saw the preview for a new show on the food network called “Rachel VS Guy Celebrity Cook off.” It has a cool little hook: Rachel Ray - a food enthusiast and in some ways a mini Oprah goes head to head against Guy Fieri - best known for having a horrible hair color that works on him, and also a NY Times best seller. Both Rachel and Guy have their teams duel by cooking, pretty simple, right?

Rachel’s team consists of: Herself, Aaron Carter, Summer Sanders, Lou Diamond Phillips, and Taylor Dayne.

Guy’s team consists of: Himself, Cheech Marin, Joey Fatone, Coolio, and Alyssa Campanella.

All seems reality show standard in the team VS team format, right? Yes, but something’s off... Oh right, the “celebrity” aspect of it. It took me a minute to swallow that the players on these teams are considered celebrities. In my world the viable celebrities on this show are: Fatone, Phillips, Cheech, and give or take Coolio. I honestly didn’t even know who Campanella was, and the only way I identified her is because she was actually wearing her “Miss USA” sash.

Not that I’m trying to take anything away from any of these people because they’ve obviously worked to get where they are, but seeing them sparked a thought process which has also been a topic of conversation for far too long. I think I have been confused with what exactly a celebrity is and where “celebrity” is going.

On a general ground rule I once associated celebrities as someone you’d know by face (that you don’t personally know). Someone that you don’t have to say “Oh that’s the person from…” At least that’s what it used to be. As cable grew it became impossible to keep up with viable actors from different shows, and the same goes for musicians. Over time a few adjustments to the celebrity rule came into place and I left some wiggle room as to which I associated with celebrity. Then as online videos grew the rule changed even more and we started to have “internet celebrities.”

As new celebrities in different mediums popped up along the way the allure and illusion of celebrity has all but faded. We once looked at someone and wanted to know what they’re doing at all times, and wondered what their lives could possibly be like. But now we have so many shows, magazines, and social networking platforms bringing us together that a peek into the lives of a actor is turning into more than just a peek, we’re being completely welcomed into their personal garbage that soon they’re “just like us.”

I personally love the openness that we currently have. The beauty of it is that we could all avoid it if we wanted too but we don’t. Celebrities have the option not to have Twitter feeds or make sex tapes, but they still do: And rightfully so – it helps their personal brand.

My issue with all of this is the lines that have been blurred into what a celebrity is. There is no fucking way I can associate Clooney and Aaron Carter both as celebrities. But maybe I have too? I looked into the definition of celebrity to be one of those annoying people who needs specifics and this is what Dictionary.com gave me:  A famous or well known person.

I need something more. This is what Wikipedia gave me:  A person who has a prominent profile and commands a great degree of public fascination and influence in day-to-day media.

By these definitional standards an argument could be made that anyone who has influence on the Web is a celebrity and team Rachel Ray is in fact built with celebrities. But it leads me to ask - Why is it that we have an unspoken understanding of celebrity value? I feel that if you’re a celebrity than you’re a celebrity… How have we come to various degrees of how famous you are?  If you’re scratching at the heels to barely be identified as a celebrity, shouldn’t that tell you something?

Should celebrity be measured by influence? Exposure? Talent?

An adjustment is coming – it has too. In an industry with so many labels we’re going to get to a point where you’re going to be labeled for what you are. If you’re a celebrity in your particular medium than that’s how you’ll be labeled: Movie celebrity, TV celebrity, Internet celebrity, Writing celebrity, Reality celebrity…. There are just too many transparencies in the world to not get to this point at some time.

Until any celebrity adjustment comes we should all enjoy our celebrity reality shows and the reality shows that create celebrities. Enjoy this time now because soon we’re all going to be blended together and to truly be a celebrity you’ll really need to stand out. We’re in the 2nd golden age of celebrity.

*** Didn’t mean to pick on Rachel and Guy, the show seems entertaining.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRCbVehdHtQ&list=UUs1o_kAxoMj1xcRyBp-rIYg&index=1&feature=plcp]  

In case you’re missing it, Peter Bragiel, Dan Bragiel, and Paul Bragiel canoed down the Mississippi… This of course… Is InTransit. If you haven’t checked it out – check it out. Also, check out - Intransit.tv as well as www.youtube.com/pdrop

Bryan Cranston: Best TV Actor Ever?

I’m currently in the process of feeding my Breaking Bad addiction that started about 2 months ago (I’m currently 5 episodes through Season 4). While watching there are about 3 constants that pop in my head. 1 – This show is almost as addicting as LOST. 2 – I never want to do Meth. 3 – Bryan Cranston is amazing.

Cranston is part of one of the single greatest show of all time – Seinfeld: Dr. Tim Whatley, DDS – 5 episodes – 5 great episodes.

Episode 1: The Mom and Pop Store: The episode where George thinks he has Jon Voight’s car and Jerry doesn’t get an invite from Whatley to attend his Thanksgiving party.

Episode 2: The Label Maker: Jerry gives Whatley Jets Super Bowl Tickets. Whatley gives Jerry a Label Maker in return, which happened to be the same label maker Elaine gave Whatley… The birth of “The Re-Gifter”.

Episode 3: The Jimmy: Jerry suspects Whatley is giving out too much Novocain at his dental office and engaging is sexual acts with his patients.

Episode 4: The Yada Yada Yada: The infamous Anti-Dentite episode. Jerry suspects Whatley converted to Judaism for the Jewish jokes.

Episode 5: The Strike: George, Elaine, and Jerry find out at Whatley’s Hanukkah party that a donation has been made in their name to the “Children’s Alliance” – they suspect this was made up by Whatley in order to not give a gift.

The thing about the 5 episodes is that they spanned over the entirety of Seinfeld. His first appearance was on the 94th episode and his last was on the 166th – the show ran for 180. Whatley was memorable, people wanted more of him, and aside from David Puddy I’d argue he was the best returning character the show had.

Post 5 awesome episodes Cranston played Hal in Malcolm in the Middle for 151 episodes. He was nominated for 3 Emmy’s while playing the father to Malcolm and the kids.

Side note: How awesome would Cranston be on “Modern Family” as Phil Dunphy?

For the record, 151 episodes of any TV is kind of a massive accomplishment. It’s the kind of thing that either never happens for actors/actresses or it happens once in a career. It’s also the kind of thing that while it’s happening you end up pigeonholing each actor in their role. Think about any memorable character you’ve ever seen for 5+ years on TV and what they end up doing afterwards. You associate people at what they’re good at, and Cranston is clearly good with comedy.

It’s a double edged sword for actors simply because once you are great as a character that’s what gets you work – so the obvious choice for Cranston is to do comedy over and over again because it’s what will keep him employed. Apparently Cranston had other ideas… Enter Walter White.

Walter White, the Chemistry teacher diagnosed with lung cancer turned Meth producer and occasional dealer. White is the lead badass on Breaking Bad, which is a far cry from Cranston’s comedy we’ve come to know him in. Which means – Cranston did what so many have failed at, he successfully transitioned from show to show, Comedy to Drama, and has sustained as a TV actor. But not only has he sustained; he’s been fucking awesome at it, and at times the best at it.

Cranston has won multiple awards playing Walter White, specifically 3 consecutive Emmy’s. The thing about Cranston is that he’s just a great actor. He’s so incredibly memorable that you have to ask: Is Bryan Cranston the best TV actor ever?

Seriously.

Who else has done such a 180 in public perception than Bryan Cranston? An argument could be made that while he was doing comedy he was part of an ensemble, more so than he is now, but he still stood out more than anyone else. When Cranston is on screen he brings it, who else has done a Cranston? And no, I’m not talking about transitioning from TV to movies - I’m talking about TV to TV.

I seriously can’t think of anyone. One name comes to mind and it’s Ted Danson – Why is Ted Danson in my head?

This is a legit argument. Is he just that good? I think so. Lets not forget he’s sneaking into movies every once in a while (Drive, Contagion, Lincoln Lawyer, Red Tails, the new Total Recall, and Affleck’s upcoming film Argo). Could Cranston go Clooney and turn into a movie star? Honestly… maybe. Why not?

I’ll stand by the fact that anyone who goes from Dr. Tim Whatley to Walter White has to be considered one of the best TV actors of all time.  Nobody has jumped from comedy to drama as memorably as Cranston.

If you don’t watch Breaking Bad… do it.