Running Diary: Packers VS Seahawks: Sunday January 18th, 2015

As a huge Green Bay Packers fan a friend and I concocted an idea on Saturday night. It was over many drinks, more than I'd like to think about, and it may not have been the best idea. The idea being: "Hey, lets create a running video diary of our thoughts and feelings during the football game tomorrow."

Sunday morning when I woke up tired and more tired, we started the video diary. And we continued the video diary. My friend was all about it, he was confident and sure footed about the Packers game, I was all about it because I like to film and post videos... but had some hesitation because I was scared of how the game may end.

But, we did it.

A running diary partially filmed on an iPhone. Against everything in my body, I filmed a Vlog on my iPhone. I'm tired, emotional, somehow look more aged than normal, and stressed beyond any plausible belief. The Packers do that to me.

If you're interested in watching ... Here ye are:

(Go Packers 2015-1016)

THE PLAYLIST. RUNNING DIARY. TIRED JOSH. 

Packer Playoffs and the return of Lost Hope.

Coffee (check), Packers socks on (check), plopped down on my couch (check), attempt to figure out how to Live Blog on wordpress but couldn’t successfully do it (check), lucky Twitter picture ready to be reposted if need be (check), nervous (sort of check), anxious (check check check). 

Packers game starts in about 30 minutes and I couldn’t be more excited. All of my irrational thoughts throughout the season lead to this game, I love it. That’s the beauty of sports. The fact that we can get a “winner” and “loser” is always the best kind of conclusion. There is definitely a finality to the world of sports, and I’m okay with that. 

I’m not totally sure if it’s the coffee or my nerves but I’m having trouble focusing on this post. Maybe a combination of both. However, I’d like to just express and come clean that there was one point in the season where I lost hope. It happened right after the Lions blew out the Pack on Thanksgiving. I specifically remember telling my friend they should rest Aaron Rodgers and call it a day, there is no way they’re making it to the playoffs. Well, shit. Here we are. I feel like a loser, a man that for a moment became the emotional sports fan that I am. 

I wanted to admit that. Clear my soul of all impurities pre game. I wanted to acknowledge that the hope I once lost has returned and I can't be a stupid fickle loser fan who leaves his team when they're down. I should have never doubted life. 

I feel good about this game. Oddly. Whatever the outcome of this game… I really hope Colin Kapernick doesn’t go berserk on the Packers. I don’t know if I can live through that again. 

Go Packers.

The Greg Jennings Fall From Grace.

Image Ahhhhh, yes, football season, welcome back. I feel good about things. I’m ready to overly engage in minute details and look at everything as absolutes. This is the life of a football fan. I’m not proud of it, but it’s just the way it is. Oh, in case anyone has forgotten I’m a Green Bay Packers fan. Lets just jump right into this…

Greg Jennings recently signed with the Vikings. Cool. Happy for the guy, I’d take more money too. Then he started to talk about Aaron Rodgers and that he’s basically unapproachable due to his stigma and the Packer organization is basically afraid to point at him when things go wrong. Okay, fine, that’s cool. But now this —

A quote from an article I read on NBC:

“When I came over here, I was kind of brainwashed, there’s no ‘kind of’ to it. Being over in Green Bay, you’re brainwashed to think anyone in the division is tiers below. And so coming over here I meet the people within the organization and I’m like, ‘Wow, these are really great people.’”

And —

“It’s like everything that you know in Green Bay is like the best, the best, the best, the best, the best,” Jennings said. “And it’s like total brainwashing. And I think you don’t open your eyes to see what other teams have to offer unless you are in that position.”

Dude, what? What happened to this guy? How much did he hate being in Green Bay?

First off, this quote about meeting great people in another organization and seeming like he’s surprised. Huh? You’re a grown man that travels to play football for a living; you never met cool people in other places?

Secondly, I’ve been to Green Bay just once for a Packers game. The place is small as shit and I feel that being in the smallest market in the NFL an organization needs to implement some form of mindset like “win win win.” The Packers (fortunately) have been good or fun to watch for the last 18 years (give or take a few years). If you’ve ever been Ashwaubenon, Wisconsin, which is a suburb of Green Bay, and also the location of Lambeau field then you’d know that the Packers are the pride and glory. That mindset Greg Jennings is cutting down is crucial.

I still like the guy, he seems like a good dude and is a good football player. But come on, let it go. He’s starting to seem desperate.

-Enter girlfriend analogy about having remorse so you keep cutting her down because you secretly love her still-

I love Football season.

Dear 49ers Fans --

Lets just excuse the bitter aspect of everything for a second because I am a Green Bay Packers fan.

I hopped on Facebook today and noticed my friend just posted a picture of Alex Smith with the tag “Who’s got it better than us?” I stared at it for a long time trying not to think what I was about to think but I thought it anyway —

You can’t use the phrase “who’s got it better than us” only when the 49ers win. That’s just not right. You either commit or you don’t commit. That phrase is the most ridiculous phrase ever uttered from any fan base that has actually lost games. You either gotta double down on the stupidity or abandoned it completely… just like Aaron Rodgers and his title belt move… um… I mean discount double check.

Are we all clear about this? Does this make sense? Any time I talk to San Francisco fans about this I never get an explanation as to how people can act like this phrase doesn’t exist. Where was this just the other week when you lost? I’m confused.

Now back to bitter Packers fan mode. Go Packers.

10 minutes later: I just read the origins of this saying and I can kind of appreciate it from a family point of view, but still… You can’t just sometimes use it.

The Weekend When a World Series Apparently Happened.

I’ll just be honest – I think I’ve given up on wanting to like baseball. It’s almost shocking for me to even say this because growing up in Wisconsin produced sports culture 101 and going to Brewers games was a normal occurrence when I was a kid. I think the times have caught up to me and I find the sport to be boring. The true test is if “my team” was in the World Series, problem is, is that I don’t really have a team anymore. I root for the Brewers due to hometown pride, the Cubs due to parental nostalgic pride, and now the Dodgers due to… shit… close proximity?

Whichever team I end up rooting for, or not rooting for, the bottom line is that baseball needs to inject itself with steroids again. I tried to watch a bit of game 4 last night and nearly fell asleep. Also, I’ve never really noticed until recently but it’s fucking annoying with all the chewing and spitting that’s happening with 90% of the players. I feel like an old man (or woman) saying that but it’s true.

Baseball needs to speed things up otherwise they’re going to fade away into the world of irrelevance.

Prediction: In lieu of NBC recently winning the rights to the Premiere League, I think soccer… ahem… futbol… will take over the ratings from baseball in the future. This is going to piss a lot of people off.

By the way, casual Sunday night NFL beat the World Series in ratings last night.

Topic transition!!!

Speaking of NFL…

My Green Bay Packers. This season has been killing me. Almost watching them lose to Blaine Gabbert yesterday only helped the production of grey hairs on my head.

I had a conversation via text with my friend who said he thinks the coaching staff needs to be realigned and Mike McCarthy needs to get the boot. I think I may agree to a certain extent. Watching the Packers week in and week out just tells me that Aaron Rodgers is amazing and he bails out the poor coaching and lack of discipline from the team.

Topic transition!!!

Speaking of movies…

Okay not speaking of movies, but I think I should note that I saw Taken 2 and Paranormal Activity 4 this weekend. I’m not exactly sure how another sequel can be produced for either franchise from here on out but my god I’m curious. I’m absolutely aware that these films may not be as great as the original but I love when sequels come out and they do well. My thought is… If people are going to see it… do it. That may not be the popular opinion but it only makes sense and dives deeper into the human psychology for specific entertainment and comfort in what we know.

Topic transition!!!

One more thing about the Packers – They’re taking form of the 2010 Packers when they played pissed off come from behind football and won the Superbowl. The only things that scare me are injuries and Eli Manning.

Onward.

Green Bay Packers: Rational Reminders

I’ve been a little reluctant to write anything about the Green Bay Packers simply because I kind of don’t know what is happening to them. Last Thursday I was talking with my friend Ottford while they were playing the Chicago Bears and we collectively may have gone through a rollercoaster of emotions that only those who are in psychotic relationships go through. One minute we were basically giving up all hope and conceded that nothing good is going to happen to this team. The next moment their defense was playing better and we talked us into the idea that they have figured out how to play and everything is okay.

We’re sports fans, this is how it’s supposed to be, right?

Moving forward I’ve made a list to keep me sane while this football season is active, these are things that I need to remind myself because without this list to knock sense into me I may look back at this time in my life as an embarrassment. An embarrassment because I cared so much about things out of my control…

Reminder 1: The Packers had a historically horrible defense last year, why would they have pulled a total 180 this year?

Reminder 2: Their offense will pull their shit together.

Reminder 3: Even though Donald Drive has never dropped a pass in his entire life and is the most reliable player on the Packers, Aaron Rodgers obviously knows something I don’t know because he’s not passing to him every play.

Reminder 4: They’re going to get a running game. No they won’t. Yes they will. No they won’t!

Reminder 5: They won the Super Bowl when they were 9-7 and season long team momentum has never seemed so important. It’s okay if the Packers lose games.

Reminder 6: The Packers have the best quarterback in the NFL.

Reminder 7: Jermichael Finley will always piss me off; I shouldn’t be surprised about his rock hands.

Reminder 8: Once again: I’m not playing on the team so for me to think that I have a single bit of control makes me reverse insane. Just accept whatever is happening (This is a crutch… but seriously I need to actually believe this).

With these year long reminders I think I can successfully remain okay with what’s happening, win or lose – or at least pretend to be okay with things.

(Former) Arrogant Packers Fan

 

Green Bay Packers VS San Francisco 49ers: Sunday, Sept 9th 2012

There is 1:30 left in the third quarter of the Packers VS 49ers game but it doesn’t take a genius to state the obvious – the Packers are sluggish and they’re going to lose.

It’s amazing how football is such an extreme minded sport. When I say “extreme” I mean we as football fans are conditioned to view things in extremes and absolutes. You’re either up or you’re down, you’re rarely in between, and when you’re up you’re REALLY up, and when you’re down you’re REALLY down.

A few months ago, before the season actually started, I was up, really up, so up that I wrote this. I thought the Packers were going to have a 14-2 season, only losing back-to-back games late in the season. Shit. I was very wrong. After watching this team I think they’re going to be more like 10-6, maybe even 9-7. No, I take that back, I can’t do 9-7, I can’t even think about that.

What I can think about is that this Packers team looks absolutely no different from last season and neither do the 49ers. The Packers are essentially built on finesse. They try to intercept everything and slap the ball from everyone’s hands. They play very free, and when it works it’s a beautiful thing. The 49ers on the other hand are built on smash mouth football. They’re a team that’s almost mechanical in their actions aka very good coaching. This finesse free balling play may not be the best way to play, but the problem is… it’s all the Packers have.

As I write this Randall Cobb just scored on a punt return. Did those officials just screw up again? Maybe. The Packers may have just inserted themselves back in this game, but I think it may be fools gold. I also just decided to turn this into a running emotional game watching experience that may end in me tossing this computer against the wall. My running emotional Packers VS 49ers log: The 4th Quarter. Time remaining is on top. 11:16 15-23: Jordy just tied it up with a 2 point conversion.

A few quick random thoughts about this whole experience as I prepare for the Packers to kick off… Are the Nike Logo’s backwards? Should I get off of social networking if the Packers actually lose so I don’t have to hear from all my friends? Why are so many Packers players are in commercials? I wish they stopped showing this 49ers guy with the bloody nose. Jermichael Finley is such a liability. 49ers driving. 10:50: Is Frank Gore doing anything? Why did I pick him up on fantasy football?

10:10: 3rd down: This is huge. SHIT Gore just got the first. They marked him short but I’m sure he got it. These officials are terrible. Oh wait, maybe the officials were right, it’s under review. I love being a fan from home; it’s so easy to be right, even when you’re wrong. I stand corrected; the officials prevail (sorry official’s).

49ers punt. Packers driving. 8:50: Aaron Rodgers tosses an interception. Fuck. That was a Favre pass to absolutely nobody. Unreal.

49ers driving: 8:50: 15-30: Gore just ran in a 23-yard touchdown. How horrible. I wish I didn’t talk about my fantasy team, I think I just jinxed the Packers nation.

I wish I could stop writing this right now. I want to turn the game off, fuck! I feel like I need to see this through right now. I was fooled by a missed call on a punt return.

Packers driving. 8:36: Another dropped pass. Another late flag.

7:30: Big 3rd down. I feel okay right now…

James Jones just had a very big play. Still, so late in the game.

7:02: Another good catch by Jones. Why the shit do the Packers even try to run the ball? They have no run game.

6:05: Touchdown Jones!! See comment above.

Random text messages from my buddy Ottford:

Jones>Finley

I completely agree with Ottford. 22-30: I suppose there is a still a game here, but it’s much closer than I want and the 49ers are just way to consistent.

49ers are driving. 4:02: Monster sack from Clay Matthews, which means we have a huge 3rd down. Oh God.

Nervous.

Nervous.

3rd and 17.

Nervous.

4th down! Green Bay uses their final time out. 3:45 left.

Green Bay driving. 3:37: Oh. My. God. Near interception. Is A Rodg nervous?

3:28: Oh. My. God. The sequel. A Rodg is sacked.

3rd and 9

Pass to Cobb, 1st down! Man, Cobb is killing it today.

Time is flying right now. Finley just caught another pass. Wait, did I just write that he caught it and it didn’t bounce off his hands like that little kid in Little Giants? Yes! He caught it!

Alright. We’re headed to the two-minute warning. The harsh reality is that even if the Packers score we need to score the two-point conversion, which just scares me. But there’s a chance…

2 minutes left…

1:53: Rodgers just scrambled and he’s the Packers leading rusher - my hands are clammy.

1:40 seconds and counting – it’s 3rd and 17.

Shit! It’s 4th down. Dksjfa;lksflkajsl;fkjsdkl;fjlkasjfkl;ajsdf;kljsaklfjklsadjfakl;kljdfl ;akjlkjsldkjg;sdlkfgjs;kldfjgskldjfg;ldfjgsl;dkjgsl kdjfgl;sdj;glkjdlkjg;sdkjglk;sjdg;lkjdfkgjs; Game over. The 49ers just won this game. Final take away:

The Packers are in trouble; they haven’t evolved from their previous season. The Packers were outplayed and outcoached.

This is a REALLY big down, I suppose there is only one way to go from here.

Onward.

 

(Arrogant) Packer Fan Prediction.

Image

 

And so it begins. Yesterday the NFL released their regular season schedule and I can’t help but speculate on what the Packers season is going to look like and anticipate the season. I’m excited to play Monday morning quarterback and somehow be smarter than the coaches for 5 or 6 days, it just feels right.

As I looked over the regular season schedule I started to feel a bit arrogant and realized that I’ve been spoiled for 2 years. I need to remind myself that The Packers division has gotten a bit stronger and it may be foolish of me to sleep on some teams (Bears, Lions, not you Vikings). The strong division is a good thing. In Wisconsin I knew this old disgruntled coach that loved playing stronger teams because he’d say “It’ll keep you honest” and that’s all I can hope for The Packers this year… They stay honest.

Without further adieu I give you the most accurate (bias) prediction I possibly can. You don’t need to watch a single game this season because this is how the Green Bay Packers season will unfold:

Week 1: 49ers at PACKERS: Packers win 27-17 to open the season. Randy Moss scores 2 touchdowns and we remember he’s playing again. Aaron Rodgers is currently considering bringing back his championship belt move. By the way, last year I realized how many 49ers fans I have and that scares me.

Record: 1-0

Week 2: Bears at PACKERS: Packers have been in the heads of the Bears players for 3 years now. Although I’m always scared of the Bears in some weird Midwestern way the Packers win 20-13.

Record: 2-0

Week 3: PACKERS at Seattle: Matt Flynn does his best A Rodg impression but unfortunately A Rodg does his best Matt Flynn VS Detroit impression. Packers win in some kind of shootout.

Record: 3-0

Week 4: Saints at PACKERS: Any single joke about the Saints and their insanely mentally fucked up team could work here. This game is a shoot out but the mentally complete Packers win 45-31.

Record: 4-0 and Aaron Rodgers was just named player of the month.

Week 5: PACKERS at Colts: Peyton Manning hangover. Packers win.

Record: 5-0

Week 6: PACKERS at Texans: Uh oh, do I sense a stumbling block from the seemingly always-pesky Texans? Yeah, actually I do, but I sense a win in the 4th quarter.

Record: 6-0

Week 7: PACKERS at Rams: Sam Bradford is to busy admiring what a good team looks like. Packers win 30-10

Record: 7-0 and everyone starts recognizing how easy their schedule has been.

Week 8: Jaguars at PACKERS: Blaine Gabbert is picked off 5 times and Aaron Rodgers is the official front-runner for MVP.

Record: 8-0

Week 9: Arizona at PACKERS: I see this game turning into a shootout that Aaron Rodgers comes away winning 31-24 and I officially begin to worry that this schedule is way to easy.

Record: 9-0

Week 10: BYE WEEK: My buddy Ottford and I brag to each other about how good the Packers are but we’re both worried about their awesome record and don’t acknowledge that they were 9-0 the previous year. We’re trying to avoid a jinx, but then I try to reverse the jinx by saying they may lose and Ottford proceeds to get pissed at me.

Record: Still 9-0 and narrowly escaped a jinx.

Week 11: PACKERS at Detroit: Matthew the Staffinfection is having a killer year, he’s somehow managed to stay healthy and the Lions are still fun to watch. Megatron will exploit the Packers for 2 touchdowns but we’re still in their heads. Packers win.

Record: 10-0

Week 12: PACKERS at Giants: I get to the bar early for this game and decide I’m going to pace myself… by halftime I’m drunk. Fortunately the Packers win this game; unfortunately everyone knows that Eli Manning is waiting for the post season to win another Super Bowl. This win almost means nothing but fortunately it’s against a good team.

Record: 11-0

Week 13: Vikings at PACKERS: Thank God we’re in Green Bay because the Metrodome is contemplating breaking down. If the Packers lose this game it’s only because Adrian Peterson runs for 200+ yards… But they win by a lot.

Record: 12-0

Note: I’m getting worried because this is very similar to last year.

Week 14: Lions at PACKERS: Upset Alert! WTF!? Detroit wins 27-24 and Packer fans are starting to realize that their secondary is still depleted… like last year. Packer fans are starting to worry about the Lions… like last year. Congratulations Stafford.

Record: 12-1

Week 15: PACKERS at Bears: Truth be told I’m worried. I think the Packers are a bit bruised from their loss last week and what’s even scarier is that Jay Culter is clicking with Brandon Marshall. My worries manifest into reality and I feel that I cause this loss. ESPN goes crazy stating it’s been nearly 2 years since the Packers lost back to back games.

Record: 12-2 

Week 16: Titans at PACKERS: Pissed and on a mission the Packers try to get their grove back, somehow. They’ve been exploited in their secondary and honestly I don’t think their running game is looking too good… If this were a better team that may matter. Packers win 35-20

Record: 13-2

Week 17: PACKERS at Vikings: Vikings don’t have a chance. The Packers are playing to win their division with style. Aaron Rodgers passes for over 400 yards and enters into the post season with a first round bye.

Regular season record: 14-2

Can’t really pinpoint what happens from here but all I can think and say is that they have to avenge their 2011 season. I’m already worried that they some how get bounced in the playoffs like last season.

I think the main issue is that I have to remind myself that the Packers hit a great streak in 2010-2011, when they won the Super Bowl, and I can’t expect that every year - now they have a bullseye on their backs like the Patriots.

Fuck it. They win the Super Bowl.

2013 Super Bowl Champions: GREEN BAY PACKERS

Random thoughts: Rodgers absolutely brings back the belt. Clay Matthews shocks the world with a short haircut. The Packers develop a running game. Donald Driver comes in 2nd on Dancing with the Stars.

Thoughts and Advice: The Quarterback

It’s official. A couple days after the most watched Super Bowl / TV program of all time the NFL season has concluded. Truthfully, my season took a major hit somewhere around 5pm PST on January 15th 2012. It was then that I watched super Eli torch the Packers the same way he did a few years ago, and I was once again reminded that it’s foolish to be so invested into something you have no control over. Am I masking my pain right now – Yes, probably.

Us Green Bay Packers fans were spoiled last year and by the out-of-nowhere Packers. We were spoiled with Aaron Rodgers nailing the Favre memory coffin and we were spoiled with a near perfect season…. Damn you for being so good then so bad! Who cares, it’s over time to move on and think of the 2012-2013, but truthfully part of me doesn’t want to think about it, I need a break. I can’t take losing any more bets and thinking about what could be… I’m taking a NFL sabbatical.

Before I stop talking about the NFL and put my efforts into more important things like movies, writing, reality TV, the Internet, and contemplating watching Justin Bieber’s movie on Netflix. I would like to give my advice on the most coveted position in the NFL: The Quarterback.

If you haven’t figured it out by now, where your QB goes, the team will follow. The new NFL coddling rules for a QB has made the position more important than ever. Having said that and moving forward I give you the:

Random Thoughts and Advice for the 2012-2013 starting QB’s of the NFL.

Arizona Cardinals - Kevin Kolb: Dude, I hope you stay away from the injuries and moving forward you need to stop thinking about all the hype you had going into the Cardinals season. Smile in your picture next year, you look miserable.

Atlanta Falcons - Matt Ryan: Change your name to Jack and channel your inner Tom Clancy.

Baltimore Ravens – Joe Flacco: I’ve always though Flacco could be named Flacman and have a legit chance of being a superhero somewhere. Just stay away from Ray Lewis.

Buffalo Bills – Ryan Fitzpatrick: We get it. You went to Harvard and have a massive beard, but the mystique has worn off. Shave that beard already.

Carolina Panther – Cam Newton: Probably one of the best rookies I didn’t watch. Newton is going to be a monster if he can stay healthy and everyone knows it.

Chicago Bears – Jay Cutler: Cutler watch out for Josh McNown… Yeah I’m just kidding. Cutler should start a new reality show with Kristen Cavalari and follow in the footsteps of Khloe and Lamar. HBO presents: (Insert anything here regarding Hard Knocks and Jay Cutler reality)

Cincinnati Bengals – Andy Dalton: Andy Dalton either sounds like a serial killer or everyone’s best friend… which is the trait of a serial killer!

Cleveland Browns – Colt McCoy: In the history of life has there ever been a more Texan name than Colt McCoy? Wait… he was born in New Mexico? But he went to Texas for college? Did he change his name midway through life just to fit in? Mind. Can’t. Compute. It was just meant to be. Last thing I remember is McCoy behind leveled in a game and playing through a concussion. Stay healthy.

Dallas Cowboys – Tony Romo:  I love Tony Romo for a few reasons: 1) He’s from Wisconsin. 2) He still sports starter gear like it’s 1995. 3) He kind of reminds me of Favre. Moving forward Romo needs to find any possible wide receiver that’s out there… Even T.O!

Denver Broncos – Tim Tebow: Will Tebow even be the starter next season? If so, for how long? I love this guy; he made the NFL amazing this year. My advice for Tebow is to ultimately ask himself for advice because he seems to have it all figured out.

Detroit Lions – Matt Stafford: The Staff-infection. Congrats on staying healthy this year, I hope (and dare you) to do it again.

Green Bay Packers – Aaron Rodgers: Bring back the Title Belt victory “dance”! You had the best consistent celebration going until Timothy Tebow started Tebowing… Embrace your celebration! Don’t hide behind the discount double check commercials.

Houston Texans – Matt Schaub errr Matt Lienart errr T.J. Yates: Um seriously who is the starting QB? Can’t Arian Foster just play this position and get it over with?

Indianapolis Colts – Peyton Manning: Not sure what’s going to happen here. Is it going to be Andrew Luck? Peyton, my advice to you is go ask Eli what to do, he seems to know it all. But seriously, I think Peyton should join the Jets and allow the Mannings to own NY.

Jacksonville Jaguars – Blaine Gabbert: I love Gabbert basically because of his last name. I’ve seen Gabbert playing for a total of 3 minutes this year… and that’s via ESPN highlights.

Miami Dolphins – Chad Henne: Hmmm, don’t know much about Henne, just make room for Matt Flynn.

Minnesota Vikings – Christian Ponder: Remember Donovan McNabb? Remember Brett Favre before McNabb!? Ponder has never looked better.

New England Patriots – Tom Brady: Is Tom Brady going to go down in history as the guy who has a “but he…” on his resume? IE: Tom Brady was maybe the greatest quarterback ever but he always lost to Eli. Or, Tom Brady lost to Eli but he is married to Giselle so whatever.

New Orleans Saints – Drew Brees: Why do I feel like Brees plays for nothing? It seems like he should have come away with so much more this past season.

New York Giants – Eli Manning: In Eli I trust. He’s got a monster head - seriously he still looks like a little kid in that oversized helmet and if he’s anywhere close to the playoffs next year…. Watch out.

New York Jets – Mark Sanchez: I get the feeling that Sanchez is living the life right now but it’s starting to catch up to him. If he doesn’t perform next year I think he’s done. Advice to him: Don’t lose in NY.

Oakland Raiders – Carson Palmer: What are they going to do with the quarterback fiasco in Oakland, and how poorly did this past season play out for The Raiders? Palmer needs to get off the surfboard and start playing; I think next season is his last shot (kind of like Sanchez)

Philadelphia Eagles – Mike Vick: I get the feeling Vick is going to be amazing next year (don’t say a dog joke, don’t say a dog joke) if I were him I would lobby for a wide receiver. Vick is good but he needs someone who’s his prime target.

Pittsburgh Steelers – Ben Roethlisberger: Did Ben really think he was going to beat Tebow in the playoffs? Fortunately Tebow just wiped Ben’s sins away, meaning next year it looks like the Steelers will be back in the Super Bowl with Mike “don’t blink” Tomlin.

San Diego Chargers – Phillip Rivers: Rivers reminds me of a crazy Chucky doll for some reason. This guy needs to just keep yelling at people and I think he’ll be fine.

San Francisco 49ers – Alex Smith: Was this past season a fluke? Will Harbaugh consider taking over for Smith as the QB? I don’t watch many 49ers games but you know what this guy needs to do – run more, he’s deceitfully fast.

Seattle Seahawks – Tavaris Jackson: It took me a minute to remember that Hasselbeck isn’t their QB anymore. Jackson just needs to keep playing into the Pete Carrol’s system and he’ll be fine. I actually find this guy to be underrated.

St. Louis Rams – Sam Bradford: Advice to you… hand the ball off as many times as possible.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Josh Freeman: Full discretion – I know nothing about the Bucs.

Tennessee Titans - Matt Hasselbeck:  Matt, you have a few years left… I still love you because you were an amazing back up on the Packers, and I’ll never forget your coin flip fuck up in the playoffs. Advice moving forward: Get out of Tennessee.

Washington Redskins – Rex Grossman: Why do I feel like this is one of the most dysfunctional teams in the NFL? Grossman needs to hand it off.

Words of wisdom from someone who is so irrelevant to a NFL player that it’s not even worth thinking about how far I’d fall on the totem pole. It’s my final assessment and my best chance to close the door on this NFL season only to wait for a key to arrive for next season. I’m genuinely happy for the Giants… it was a great season. Must. Focus. Elsewhere.

 

 

 

Time To Get Ahead Of Myself.

Jerry Rice fumbled! I had to get that out before I mention it 8 more times before this post is over.

Last night I had coffee with someone who’s from the Bay area and a huge 49ers fan. Within 5 minutes of conversation we were unintentionally talking about football and discussing the turn around that the 49ers had this year. Then I laid out a fact that opened up conversation for about 10 more minutes:

“I’m from Wisconsin”

In the world of two football fans who are relatively the same age our minds went to the same area, the area of late 90’s NFL when Brett Favre was smoking the 49ers almost every season (At least that’s where mine went).

For me that time period was somewhat a changing of the guards (briefly) as the NFL saw the dominate 49ers take a back seat to the up and coming Green Bay Packers.

In 1994 – 49ers won the Super Bowl.

In 1995 – Packers beat the 49ers in the first round of the playoffs then lost to Dallas.

In 1996 – Packers beat the 49ers in the playoffs (Again) and went on to win the Super Bowl.

In 1997 – Packers beat the 49ers in the playoffs (Again!) and went on to lose to John Elway (who did his best Tim Tebow impression) in the Super Bowl.

Enter 1998 -

The 49ers beat the Packers in the playoffs on a fluke drive that ended up with Terrell Owens (who dropped 47 passes this game) catching the game-winning pass with no time remaining. In TO’s defense it was a great game winning catch.

The asterisk on this game was the fumble Jerry Rice had but it was not called a fumble. As a matter of fact this play was a huge part in why we have Instant Replay today. Anyway…

My San Francisco friend and I went on to talk about the possibilities of the 49ers and Packers meeting again this year in the Playoffs… and I really want this to happen. It just so happens the 49ers pulled a 180 this year and are relevant again. The only chance they have to meet is the Championship game which determines who is going to the Super Bowl – which makes it that much better.

Can you imagine the nostalgic conversations that every analyst will have if these two teams meet? I can already imagine FOX calling Brett Favre and asking him to comment on the game, to which Favre writes “NO” on his middle finger, snaps a picture of it, and sends it by snail mail to the FOX producers.

Not to get ahead of myself because both 49ers and Packers have tough roads ahead… But I want this! I want to see Aaron Rodgers get his over due personal 49ers revenge for not picking him in the NFL draft… And I want the game to end with Donald Driver catching a game-winning touchdown a la TO style… Only Driver won’t start crying to anyone who’s willing to look at him.

Please football Gods – make this happen.

NFL Players: What Are You Talking About?

It’s time I come to terms and try to open a discussion about the culture that is NFL lingo. I don’t know if I should be ashamed with what I’m about to say or if others have been concealing this too. I know I can’t be in this boat by myself but as an NFL fan I’ve been lying to myself.

David Fleming from ESPN the Magazine had a conversation with Aaron Rodgers for their “Interview Issue.”

Side Note: Out on Stand Dec 12th, and also a great read.

The conversation is essentially a breakdown and the progress of Aaron Rodgers. Being a massive Packers fan I took a little more interest in what he had to say, then I read something…

Coming off of a question about James Jones and a Touchdown. Flemings question is in BOLD.

Is part of that getting to a place where complicated reads, such as the TD to Jones, just become second nature?

"It's quicker reactions and being more decisive with my checks. When you really start figuring things out as a quarterback, you realize you don't have to be perfect every time, but you do have to be quick and decisive. On that play, we had James on the left and Greg Jennings on the right. The pass check was for James to run a man-beater route -- a route with a double move that works well against single coverage. We were hoping the Chargers would go to a one-high safety look. Instead, they played more quarters, where each DB plays a quarter of the field, and they used high-low coverage on Greg. My quick reaction was that we still have man coverage on the other side with James, who is running a man-beater route. It wasn't perfect, but we still had good options to work with."

When I finished reading A Rodg’s response I thought - “Oh, So Rodgers makes quicker decisions and he passed to Jones because Jennings was initially covered.” But that’s the problem right there! That’s only sort of what Rodgers said, as a matter of fact he said a few things that I have no fucking clue what they mean:

“We were hoping the Chargers would go to a one-high safety look.”

“…The pass check was for James to run a man-beater route -- a route with a double move…"

”Instead, they played more quarters, where each DB plays a quarter of the field…”

“…and they used high-low coverage on Greg.”

In one answer I’m partially confused, not totally but partially, and the thing is – this isn’t some fluke answer, this is how regular repartee is in the NFL. Come on. As a fan when I talk to my buddy I don’t say “Wow, did you see the secondary in that nickel defense? I can’t believe the corners dropped back.”

I say “Dude, Jones just caught a good fucking pass from Rodgers! Touchdown!”

I can appreciate the coaches/players analysis and it’s not as though I want it to be stopped, I just want a better explanation. There’s no way these guys can think we all know what they’re talking about. Come to think of it, Ron Jaworski from Monday Night Football has great breakdowns and explains regarding what he’s talking about. But he’s one of the few.

Can I be alone on this? No way, I just can’t. I want a simplistic analysis from these guys; they have to know it’s what we want (or I want). I’m kind of getting tired of sitting in a room with my football friends and hearing some rubix cube of an explanation of what just happened and then nobody acknowledges it.

Am I alone on this? Is it just part of the football culture? Did I just out myself as a moronic football fan?

A link to the article: http://espn.go.com/nfl/story/_/id/7295185/nfl-green-bay-aaron-rodgers-greatest-season-qb-ever-had

In Game Monday Night Football Blog... (Saints VS Giants)

3rd quarter 1:11 seconds – Did anyone notice the guy painting a picture of Drew Brees … on the field? I can’t take any more emotional stories from The Saints - it’s impossible not to love them.

I don’t know why I haven’t turned off this game to watch last Sunday’s Boardwalk Empire.

End of the 3rd Quarter: Anyone just see that dude with the big whistle as a hat… who was whistling. Next to him was a Saints fan wearing a Portland Trailblazers hat. Speaking of the Trailblazers… so happy the NBA is returning for a cameo this year.

Barry Sanders is on a commercial right now – part of me still thinks he could rush for 1,000 yards.

Start of the 4th quarter… Woah, 72 yard Giants TD… comeback!?

The only thing that could stop the Packers and their pursuit for undefeated glory is if they rest their players a la Colts 09.

If you live in LA then you’ve seen this stupid Ford Jamal Anderson commercial. What the fuck is this?

I can’t believe Dennis Miller was once a commentator on Monday Night Football, what the hell were they thinking?

Just saw Sproles speed down the field – how quickly have The Saints forgotten about Reggie Bush?

Is there any part of the San Diego Chargers that miss Drew Brees?

Does Darren Sharper still play for The Saints? Was he better with the Saints or The Packers? I’m going to say the Pack… Bias opinion of course.

There is something badass about Sean Payton standing injured on the sideline calling plays.

WOW. Jimmy Graham just got bent backwards. Holy shit.

Gonna wrap this up, The Saints are showing no signs of slowing down. Current score is 35-17 with 11:02 in the 4th. Final score prediction: 49-27 (If the Giants are lucky).

To my buddy Ottford who is praying Eli Manning doesn’t throw to Nicks anymore for fantasy football purposes - I feel like you’ll win this, don’t worry (You have the power of Tebow).

Whoops – just going to post this and The Saints scored again in the last 10 seconds. New score prediction: 95-27.

Adios Jinx: The Perfect Green Bay Packers Season

I’m a sports fan, and being a sports fan means I believe in random superstitions and raw emotion generally tanks logic more than I’d like to admit. I occasionally believe in random jinxes and from time to time am afraid to admit this to myself simply because I feel to embarrassed…I’m a sports fan.

In my world you walk a fine line between gloating and creating the ultimate jinx, it’s actually tough not to cross the two - The reason we worry about a jinx is because we have a personal investment in the team, we actually care. The reason we gloat is because we’re so proud as if we’re actually quarterbacking the team.

I’ve turned the other cheek and am very careful not to create commotion in my jinx world; I’ve played it safe because I’ve been burned before.

I’ve played it cool… I’ve played it smart… I didn’t want to jinx a single person… I didn’t want to jinx my team. But today that changes.

Fuck you potential jinx. Today I announce what I’ve been thinking all NFL season:

The Green Bay Packers are going undefeated. I want them to go undefeated. I never want them to lose.

Somewhere my friend Alex just got very pissed off with me for “calling it” but I had too, and I know he’s thinking the same thing too, but neither one of us want to be responsible if they lose.

I hate it when ESPN starts with the Miami Dolphin undefeated 72’ season talk at weeks 2 and to be honest I’m sick of them leading off shows with “Looks like the Dolphins can pop the champagne” once the 5-0 whoever lose their game. I don’t want to hear about it anymore, I want to hear about the 2011 Packers going undefeated - all the way through the Super Bowl.

Here’s why they’ll do it:

The Offense: Is it just me or do these guys really like each other? If the Packers were on Hard Knocks I bet we’d see them playing monopoly with each other’s families. Why is it important for them to like each other? Duh, they want each other to succeed.

Aaron Rodgers: It’s a good time to be QB in the NFL; A Rodg is experiencing that right now. As long as he’s going… the Packers will not lose.

Well, wait… I’ll stop, that’s it, that’s why they’ll go undefeated. The A Rodg led offense is so good that it’s tough to keep up with them at this moment in time, the only way you can come close to beating them is by keeping them off the field.

Why they won’t do it:

Injures: That’s it.

Old me would have just given myself the Larry David skeptical stare down and asked why I just opened the door on a potential jinx of injuries, poor Rodgers play, bad offensive play, and the perfect season. New Me is the guy staring back at Larry David confident in whatever I just said – knowing the only way to this machine down is through the unfortunate injury.

The Packers are good and my logic is telling me nobody can stop them, they’re currently like the opening sequence of Last Boy Scout where Billy Banks is running down the field shooting everyone because nobody will stop them… The Packers are him - minus the gun.

Today I denounce a jinx. ESPN please start prepping any and all clever things you have to say about the Miami Dolphins and Green Bay Packers. The Packers are going 16-0.

I say this with confidence.

Tony Romo the lone man wearing "Starter" gear.

Me + 1996 + Football = Starter Gear. Aside from white kids in the 90’s living in the suburbs the only other people wearing Starter stuff were gang members repping the Raiders and oh… yeah… The Cowboys.

I think Romo is trying to bring back Starter. He sports the starter cap like it never went out of style, and wearing it, he either looks like Johnny Football, some guy so out of touch with fashion that it’s funny, or maybe he just doesn’t care. Seeing that he only dated public figures something tells me that he’s aware he’s in the public eye, not to mention he’s playing for “America’s team.”

The thing with the starter cap that he’s seemingly always wearing, is that it’s continuously really beat up and looks like it’s been worn 789 times. The obvious reason for this – Starter endorses him, but he could get around wearing the hat.

Honestly, I like the hat and think it’s awesome he’s wearing it, Tony Romo may be onto something… Fashion recycles every 20 years, right?

A moment of appreciation for the lone man wearing a starter cap…

RAPID NFL BOX SCORE REACTION

When the Mom comes to visit over the weekend it usually means one thing – I’m not watching much TV. Fortunately it’s early in the NFL season and I’ve yet to become completely attached to this season. I’m just mildly attached. So, as her and I were walking through the Grove in Los Angeles I quickly jumped on a computer at the Apple store. I looked to see the score of the Packers game– it was 3rd quarter and closer than I anticipated. I check the box score and saw that Cam Newton was about to throw for 400 yards again… What the hell was I missing?

Box scores are probably the greatest thing ever. Who cares if your team is winning, I want to know how everyone is doing individually. After I saw Newtons yards I text my friend and asked if he was outplaying Aaron Rodgers, my friend didn’t respond. I actually still don’t know if he was.

This is Cam Newton’s numbers: 28/46, 432 yards, 1 TD, 3 INT’s.
This is Aaron Rodgers’ numbers: 19/30, 308 yards 2 TD’s , No INT’s.

What does this tell me? It says Cam was slinging the football like a running back didn’t exist. I looked at the running back stats – turned out Cam Newton was their leading rusher – Yards and Attempts.

The Box Score tells us this dude doesn’t trust his team. He’s trying to do it all. If he wants to toss the ball 50 times a game and go for 400 yards, be my guest, but there will come a point when Wins will be more impressive. Having said that biased POV from a Packers fan, I think Cam Newton may be the real deal (2 games in to his career).

I looked through the remaining Box Scores and checked out the one thing that stuck out, which basically allowed me to determine the fate of each team. I present to you:

RAPID NFL REACTION BASED OFF OF BOX SCORES:

Jaguars (1-1): 3
Jets (2-0): 32

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: The Jaguars quarterback Luke McCown was 6/19 for 59 yards and 4 INTs. Apparently they benched him for Blaine Gabbert who threw for 52 yards. Maurice Jones Drew ran the ball 18 times for 88 yards.

The Jets D is very good. They’re the combination of the Ravens from 2001 and the Cowboys from the 90’s. They’re really dysfunctional, entertaining, and good. If they had a Ray Lewis type personality then they may never let anyone score a point again. But then again, this is the Jaguars, and the Jags fans are dreaming about David Gerrard right now.

Seahawks (0-2): 0
Steelers (1-1): 24

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: Sure, the Steelers didn’t allow 1 point. Sure, Ben Roethlisberger looks great in his 22/30 298 yard performance. Sure, the Seahawks are still thinking about the Playoffs last season when they somehow won. But the one bright star to all of this is Tarvaris Jackson! Yes, Jackson: 20/29 159 yards passing. It’s weak, yes. But the Steelers D is tough and The Seahawks have a weak offensive line.

The Seahawks may actually win a game this year with the Vikings forever back up.

Cardinals (1-1): 21
Redskins (2-2): 22

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: The score itself. The Redskins are 2-0 under Rex Grossman. If you forgot the Grossman predicted the Redskins would win the NFC East this year. Well, so far he’s right.

Also, Larry Fitzgerald had 133 yards, that’s over half of the passing yards from Kevin Kolb (251). He’s got to be the best receiver in the NFL.

Packers (2-0): 30
Panthers (0-2): 23

See above. But one more thing: I don’t think the Packers know who their running back is…yet. However, this isn’t a bad thing – if we’ve forgotten, they won the Superbowl with a depleted backfield last year.

Cowboys (1-1): 27
49ers (1-1): 24

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: No, it’s not the 345 yards from Tony Romo, nor is it how bad Frank Gore was (20 rushes, 47 yards). It’s the 3 fumbles from the Cowboys – Romo, Miles Austin, and Felix Jones. Fortunately they didn’t lose the ball… but this could be a problem down the road.

Also, Jon Kitna came in and replaced Romo, he proceeded to throw 2 INTs. I can’t explain why I like Kitna, maybe it’s some sort of pity or because he resembles KANE from the WWE, but it’s not the 90’s anymore and with Romo out, the Cowboys will always lose.

Bengals (1-1): 22
Broncos (1-1): 24

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: Easy – Bengals QB Andy Dalton throwing for 332 yards, 2 TD’s and no INTs saying F-U Carson Palmer.

The secondary thing that sticks out: Cedric Benson only rushing for 59 yards on 16 carries… ehhh… not looking good for the Bungles.

Texans (2-0): 23
Dolphins (0-2): 13

ONE THING THT STUCK OUT: Yo! Reggie Bush! Screw you. You’re on my fantasy football team and you’re more up and down than the stock market - 18 yards rushing and 3 yards receiving? Come on, man.

Right now the Texans have so much hope, and I like that, they’ve been on the “verge” for so long.

Raiders (1-1): 35
Bills (2-0): 38

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: The Raiders were winning 21-3 at halftime and they lost this game? Are the Bills for real?

Lions (2-0): 48
Chiefs (0-2): 3

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: Matt Cassel and his 3 INTs. I thought he’d be a little better than this after his Kenny Powers Adidas campaign in the off-season. Looks like the Lions D may be gaining some confidence.

Could the Lions actually be for real? Stafford = healthy, then maybe.

Ravens (1-1): 13
Titans (1-1): 26

ON THING THAT STUCK OUT: If Matt Hasselbeck throws for over 300 yards on the Ravens D then that’s 100% obvious proof that this defense has officially declined. They’ve been so good for so long this was only a matter of time. But on the flip side they held Chris Johnson for 53 yards. What’s happening?

Flacco looks like he was struggling (against the Titans?) I can’t really get a gauge on either of these teams but my gut says the Titans will slip and the Ravens will be above average.

Browns (1-1): 27
Colts (0-2): 19

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: Adam Vinatieri’s 4 field goals (39 yards, 27 yards, 52 yards, 36 yards). Peyton Manning must be going nuts.

Buccaneers (1-1): 24
Vikings (0-2): 20

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: Adrian Peterson had 120 yards, 2 TD’s and they still lost? Man, this could be a long year for the Vikings… and for AP.

Bears (1-1): 13
Saints (1-1): 30

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: Matt Forte doing double duty with 10 carries for 49 yards and 10 receptions for 117 yards. Apparently Jay Cutler has found his man. Also, the Bears had 4 fumbles (Cutler, Hester, Hurd, Tillman) - they lost 1. That’s either a shaky offense or the Saints D is pretty good.

Brees and the Saints rebounded nicely from last week… they may be very very good. Not to mention they seem to have forgot about Reggie.

Chargers (1-1): 21
Patriots (2-0): 35

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: The obvious is Tom Brady throwing 3 TDS, no INTs, 423 yards, and spreading the field like mayo to 7 different receivers. Brady… please don’t get injured you’re too fun to watch.

But the story here is Antonio Gates getting 1 ball thrown his way with 0 catches.

Eagles (1-1): 31
Falcons (1-1): 35

ONE THING THAT STUCK OUT: Matt “Tom Clancy” Ryan shedding the Vickness and tossing 4TD’s.

I actually caught the first half of this late game and when I heard Vick was injured I felt really bad. Watching him scramble is so exciting because of how vulnerable he is. Yesterday he looked a little forced and he was playing a possessed city, I can’t figure out why the fans were booing him. Don’t you think prison was enough?

A general overall take away from these box scores is the ridiculously high QB numbers. The new league is paving the way for records to be shattered and QB’s to run wild. If you don’t know – The NFL now protects their QB’s more than ever to “prevent injury”. But what that means is they want to keep their golden boys on the field for $$$ reasons. A perfect example is Peyton Manning. Who the F cares about the Colts if he’s not on the field? I kind of like this new rule just for excitement purposes.

Should I be scared that the box score is sometimes just as exciting as games themselves? (Words of a Fantasy Football player).

Fantasy Footbal - Personal Attachments - and The Autodrafter.

It’s Saturday August 3rd, 1:58pm and I grabbed a Sam Adams beer to sip on before I start to organize my ideal Fantasy Football roster for our Monday draft. But first – about this beer - I’m sure we’re all familiar with the commercials of Sam Adams beer and the founder sticking his face in the hopps like he’s snorkeling. Then the commercial proceeds to brag about how many awards it wins and how much they all love beer.

I’m certain those commercials have made everyone just a tad more suspicious of their first Sam Adams sip. We take the sip and suddenly a flash of that dude sticking his face in the hopps appears. The thing is, I find this beer really good, but I can’t figure out if I’ve been brain washed from that happy go lucky commercial. Anyway, I digress…

The Fantasy Football draft: I know who I want, we all know who we want entering fantasy football, we all have the moment of a dream when we think we can assemble the perfect team. And at this point someone would typically make a list of players who are sleepers or who would make your team better, but I need to take a different approach.

Every year I take people who I think will enhance my team and when the season is over I reflect and I typically I traded them. Why do I trade them if I thought my team would be better? Well, because I knew I was taking them off of total and complete hope that they’re better than I think, or because I have some personal attachment to him. Having the personal attachment is a problem. You draft off of what was, or what will never by (hype). Which, brings me to a list of players who I have to write out of my draft…

I give you:

“The Players Not To Take Because Someone Somewhere Has A Personal Attachment To Them, Including Me” list.

- Reggie Bush: Okay, so my girlfriend went to USC. Okay, so I’ve seen the Kardashian porno and Bush resembles Ray J. Okay, so every time he touched the ball in college he did something that steaming Willie Beamon may have done in Any Given Sunday. Okay, so he we sort of slighted by the Texans when they passed on him for Mario Williams and he was taken second my the Saints in 2006. Okay, so he helped New Orleans rebuild as a community and helped them win their first Super Bowl title (which was great by the way).

Personal feeling aside for what he did with Louisiana he has killed me in fantasy football. I’ve literally been trying to take Reggie Bush since 2006 in hopes that he’s Barry Sanders, but he’s not. Bush is the ultimate decoy on the field, which doesn’t help fantasy at all. Coaches fear that he’s almost as fast as Usain Bolt and they always have to keep an eye on him. But his numbers don’t lie, and he hasn’t been the biggest help to me or anyone else in fantasy land. Maybe this year will be different on the Dolphins… maybe. But as far as I’m concerned – I’ve learned from my past… no more!

- Donald Driver: In all honesty after I typed Driver I just started at my wall and contemplated banging my head into it until I passed out and forgot what I typed. If you don’t know, I’m from Wisconsin, and I love this man as a football player. Love. Man love. He’s been solid since 1999 and is the premiere catalyst to any team. If this was X-Factor, Simon Cowell would say that Driver has it, he’s that important to the Green Bay Packers.

Here’s the thing – The Pack are more loaded than Gary Busey on any given weekend. They have the ability to go to Greg Jennings, James Jones, Jordy Nelson (modern day Don Beebe) and Jermichael Finley (whose coming off a injury and is hungry for footballs). Also, the Pack are unselfish, which is why everyone should love them. If they win another Super Bowl they’re flirting with being the Midwest version of the Patriots. Seriously.

Point is - DD doesn’t get the ball like I want DD to get the ball. This past year his average receptions dropped by about 22 over the last 10 years, his yards have been the lowest since an injured 2001 season. I just can’t take you DD but I think you’re more important to the Packers than any wide receiver… easily. Not to mention you have Jerry Rice like work out regimen.

- Drew Brees: I know, I know. Drew Brees is Drew Brees. Truthfully I don’t know if one guy has done so much with a team that doesn’t have the super stars, which is a testament to Brees and the coaching staff. But I can’t ignore the fact that DB threw 22 interceptions last year, the most of his career, and they’ve lost some key people on offense. Specifically they lost Bush (see above) by the way Bush was injured last year… maybe that’s why so many INT’s were thrown?

I think that Brees is way to risky and in my opinion a tad bit Fantasy overrated. He brings the intangibles like leadership, and I would take him if motivational speeches got me 7 points per game but they don’t. I’m expecting a questionable year, and I don’t like that. I need to remind myself to stay away from this guy… he may be great… he may have helped rebuild a city… he may have looked at San Diego in the face and said “F-U” but in 2011-2012….ehhhhh.

- Frank Gore: The good is that he’s one of the best pass catch running backs in the league. He averages 4.7 yards per carry in his career. So dude can play some football, no doubt about it. But, he always seems to go high in my drafts, and I actually always try to take him. I need to remind myself of something –

He’s played just 1 full season since 06.
06’ was the lone season he’s had 300+ carries.
He fumbles like a politician – 4.3 times per season.
He’s in a new system with a head coach that has never been in the NFL. The good news about this, is that the very same head coach ran the ball 535 in 2010 and threw it 379 in a college system… so there’s hope.

I suppose it’s the fact that injuries are injuries, and Gore unfortunately is susceptible. I love you man, but I gotta let the logic take over (Unless I can get you late in the draft).

- Donovan McNabb: Remember when you were the starting QB in Philly 2 seasons ago and now you’re starting in Minnesota? What happened?

I love McNabb, I’ve always loved him but I think it’s time to just sit back and part ways. It’s as though I don’t even know who this guy is anymore. In Andy Reids system you knew what you were going to get from him, not to mention he was the respected leader of the team.

I don’t know if he’s going to Brett Favre 2010 or Brett Favre 2011 on the Vikings (trying to not throw in a penis joke… Success). I just have to pass on this guy because as much as I’ve loved what he’s done in the past… I just don’t trust him - he’s just a comfortable pick. For the record I hope he succeeds.

I can’t believe I’m going to write this next name…

- Peyton Manning: The 4 time NFL MVP. Let me clarify something. The only reason I put Manning on here is because he’s been a lock to take in the first round. If some crazy fan wanted PM and took him first, we’d question it, give him shit, but ultimately understand it.

Unfortunately the lock out wasn’t kind to Peyton as he’s fighting an injury that looks like it will keep him out of the first game of the season, and maybe more. When the season was coming to a close last year, this man who is the most mechanical in the league started to look a little shaky. He kind of reminded me of Favre in his final Green Bay years, minus the gun slinging aspect of it. But he’s definitely taking more chances, which I don’t think is a good thing.

He’s still good, as a matter of fact he’s still kind of great. But something is a little different about him… I’m not saying to avoid this guy all together, I’m just saying that not taking him in the first few rounds wouldn’t be a bad idea.

I should stop this list now because my fingers are still burning from writing about Peyton Manning. I have this feeling that I’m going to pass on him and he’s going to put up 45 touchdowns and 11 interception this season, giving an emphatic “I’m a Manning” middle finger to all the doubters. Time to finish my beer.

On to my Labor Day draft.

LABOR DAY: 10:16am.

Just finished the draft and I not only picked McNabb in the 13th round but I took Bush earlier in the 9th round. Have I learned nothing? Damn, it just felt right.

Moving on, 2 final thoughts:

1 – On paper, pre actual football, everybody’s team looks great. Everyone feels confident, myself included.

2 – The autodrafter, you son of a bitch. Not sure how it always happens but it seems to happen. When you have an autodrafter in your league I think it automatically brings the league prestige down by 10%. We had 1 autodrafter. Since we have a 10-person league we’re currently operating at 90%. The only way we can go back up is if the autodrafter attempts to make 50 trades before the season. And we still can’t get to 100% I think the highest we can go is 98%.

About the Autodrafter:

He called me early this morning, like 3:30am early, and sounded like he was on a Lindsay Lohan binge. I called him back – nothing. I tried later – straight to voicemail and said his voicemail was full. In his defense… this sounds like a good excuse. But is it really ever a good excuse to be the Tonto of a Fantasy Football draft?

Bonus Final thought:

This was the first time in my football life Brett Favre hasn’t been in the draft pool. Nobody cared or thought twice about it. How quickly we forget people when they change teams, change teams again, make one of those teams really good, take pictures of their dick, and then retire (again).

A moment of silence for Brett Favre… Now a moment of excitement for the return of fantasy football.